View Full Version : Joke time!!

12-09-2003, 12:43 PM
After a few years of married life, a man finds that he is unable to perform. He goes to his doctor and his doctor tries a few things but nothing seems to work. Finally the doctor says to him, "The reason that you can not perform is all in your mind!!!"
So the Doctor refers him to a psychiatrist. After a few visits to the shrink, the psychiatrist confesses, "I am at a loss as to how you could possibly be cured." so he refers him to a witch doctor. The witch doctor says, "I can cure this." He throws a white powder in a flame and there is a flash with billowing blue smoke. The witch doctor says, "This is powerful healing, but you can only use it once a year! All you have to do is say '123' and it shall rise for as long as you wish!"
The guy then asks the witch doctor, "What happens when it's over and I do not want an erection any longer?"
The witch doctor says, "All you or your partner has to say is '1234' and it will go down. But be warned; it will not work again for another year!"
The guy goes home and that night he is ready to surprise his wife. He showers, shaves, and puts on his most exotic shaving lotion. After he gets into bed and he is lying next to her he says, "123" and suddenly he gets an erection just as the witch doctor said.
His wife was facing the other way and turns over and says, "What did you say "123" for?"


12-09-2003, 12:57 PM
...a lady walks into a second story bar and not wanting to sit alone while drinking she sits next to the only guy sitting at the bar. She orders a drink and tells the barkeep to get this man whatever he wants. The guy orders a 'magic beer'. She laughs and says "yea right a magic beer" where upon the guy get off his stool, jumps out the second story window, flys around the build and returning to his barstool. He says "see magic beer" The lady is sold and orders herself a magic beer, drinks it and jumps out the window, and falls screaming to the pavement.

The barkeep walks up to the guy and says "Superman you are a real jerk when your drunk"