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wolfdancer
01-18-2004, 04:16 PM
NAMING THE FATHER FOR CHILD SUPPORT - ENGLAND

The following are all replies that British women have put on Child Support
Agency forms in the section for listing father's details: These are genuine
excerpts from the forms.

01. Regarding the identity of the father of my twins, child A was
fathered by Jim Munson. I am unsure as to the identity of the
father of child B, but I believe that he was conceived on the same night.

02. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my child as I
was being sick out of a window when taken unexpectedly from
behind. I can provide you with a list of names of men that I think
were at the party if this helps.

03. I do not know the name of the father of my little girl. She
was conceived at a party at 3600 Grand Avenue where I had
unprotected sex with a man I met that night. I do remember that
the sex was so good that I fainted. If you do manage to track down
the father can you send me his phone number? Thanks.

04. I don't know the identity of the father of my daughter. He
drives a BMW that now has a hole made by my stiletto in one of the
door panels. Perhaps you can contact BMW service stations in this
area and see if he's had it replaced.

05. I have never had sex with a man. I am awaiting a letter from
the Pope confirming that my son's conception was immaculate and
that he is Christ risen again.

06. I cannot tell you the name of child A's dad as he informs me
that to do so would blow his cover and that would have cataclysmic
implications for the British economy. I am torn between doing
right by you and right by the country. Please advise.

07. I do not know who the father of my child was, as all squaddies
look the same to me. I can confirm that he wore a Royal Green Jacket.

08. Peter Smith is the father of child A. If you do catch up with
him can you ask him what he did with my AC/DC CDs?

09. From the dates it seems that my daughter was conceived at
EuroDisney. Maybe it really is the Magic Kingdom.

10. So much about that night is a blur. The only thing that I
remember for sure is Delia Smith did a program about eggs earlier
in the evening. If I'd have stayed in and watched more TV rather
than going to the party at 146 Miller Drive, mine might have
remained unfertilized.

11. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my baby, after
all when you eat a can of beans you can't be sure which one made you fart.


--------- Good thing I wasn't in England at the time...I could be blamed for 03...then again, maybe they just fall asleep???