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dg-in-centralpa
05-03-2004, 03:00 PM
>
> This 85-year-old couple, having been married almost 60 years, die
tragically
> in a car crash. They have been n good health the last ten years, mainly
due
> to the wife's nearly neurotic interest in health food.
>
> When they reached the pearly gates, St. Peter took them to their mansion,
> which was decked out with a beautiful kitchen and master bath suite,
> complete with Jacuzzi. As they "oohed and aahed' the old man asked St.
Peter
> how much all this was going to cost.
>
> "It's free," St. Peter replied, "Remember, this is Heaven."
>
> Next they went out back to see the championship golf course the home
backed
> up to. They would have golfing privileges every day, and each week the
> course changed to a new one representing the great golf Courses on Earth.
>
> The old man asked, "What are the green fees?"
>
> "This is Heaven," St. Peter replied. "You play for free."
>
> Next they went to the clubhouse and saw the lavish buffet lunch with the
> cuisines of the world laid out.
>
> "How much to eat?" asked the old man.
>
> "Don't you understand yet?" St. Peter asked. "This is Heaven. It's free!"
>
> "Well, where are the low-fat and low-cholesterol foods?" the old man asked
> timidly.
>
> "That's the best part ... you can eat as much as you like of whatever you
> like and never get fat and you ever get sick. This is Heaven."
>
> The old man looked at his wife and said, "You and your #@!%&~bran muffins.
I
> could have been here ten years ago!"

DG - best I can do on a Monday