View Full Version : His vs Hers- Round MCXVII

05-01-2002, 10:45 AM
Finally the truth From the Guys' Perspective: The accuracy of these is

uncanny... We always hear "the rules" from the feminine side. Ok - we
now hear the guys' side. These are our rules! Please note ... these are
all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put
it down.

1. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we
can find the perfect present yet again!

1. Sometimes, we are not thinking about you. Live with it.

1. Do not ask us what we are thinking about unless you are prepared to
discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation, and NASCAR.

1. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the
tides. Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport, and no, we are never going to think of it
that way.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do
not work. Strong hints do not work. Obvious hints do not work. Just say

1. We don't remember dates. Mark birthdays and anniversaries on a
calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand.

1. Most guys own three pairs of shoes -- tops. What makes you think
be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with
your dress?

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's
what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

1. Check your oil! Please.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In
fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us
to act like soap opera guys.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways

makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it's genetic.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it
done-not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.

1. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two
months we were going out. Get over it. And quit whining to your

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach,
for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have
no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of
mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like
nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the

Eric >can't remember if Eve gave it to Adam or Adam asked for it

05-01-2002, 10:54 AM
Good afternoon:

Well said, Sir, Well said.

However, in an attempt to make it a little easier for all of the males with-in the species, just remember that Women are from Venus and Men are from Mars. Two different worlds, in more ways then one.

Dr. D.

05-01-2002, 11:38 AM
Braggingly, I post:

MCXVII = 1117

SPetty ~~ Learned Roman Numerals in 1968 (MCMLXVIII) and can still do many of them now...