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wolfdancer
12-29-2004, 01:20 PM
I took one of them online quizes, and...learned that after over 40 years of being together...Ken has been dumped, by Barbie, in favor of one of them Aussie, surfer types. Wait'll she finds out the only thing that's up....is the surf.

and an airline has come up with a novel way to reduce payroll expenses...they're asking their employees, the ones scheduled off, to work for free over the New Year's weekend.
This is even more cost effective then outsourcing....
If this catches on, GWB can claim more Americans are now working...and just skip over the fact, that they're not getting paid.
Where is Jimmy Hoffa? now that we need him.

Deeman2
12-29-2004, 01:38 PM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote wolfdancer:</font><hr>
Where is Jimmy Hoffa? now that we need him. <hr /></blockquote>

<font color="blue"> In a piece of concrete, just where he belongs... </font color>

SnakebyteXX
12-29-2004, 02:01 PM
[ QUOTE ]
Ken has been dumped, by Barbie, in favor of one of them Aussie, surfer types. Wait'll she finds out the only thing that's up....is the surf.
<hr /></blockquote>

Aging Gracefully Barbie ~ Finally, a Barbie we can relate to!

Bifocal Barbie -

Comes with her own set of blended-lens fashion frames in six wild colors (half-frames too!), neck chain and large-print editions of Vogue and Martha Stewart Living.

Hot Flash Barbie -

Press Barbie's bellybutton and watch her face turn beet red while tiny drops of perspiration appear on her forehead. Comes with hand-held fan and tiny tissues.

Facial Hair Barbie -

As Barbie's hormone levels shift, see her whiskers grow. Available with teensy tweezers and magnifying mirror.

Flabby Arms Barbie -

Hide Barbie's droopy triceps with these new, roomier-sleeved gowns. Good news on the tummy front, too -- muumuus with tummy-support panels are included.

Bunion Barbie -

Years of disco dancing in stiletto heels have definitely taken their toll on Barbie's dainty arched feet. Soothe her sores with the pumice stone and plasters, then slip on soft terry mules.

No-More-Wrinkles Barbie -

Erase those pesky crow's-feet and lip lines with a tube of Skin Sparkle-Spackle, from Barbie's own line of exclusive age-blasting cosmetics.

Soccer Mom Barbie -

All that experience as a cheer-leader is really paying off as Barbie dusts off her old high school megaphone to root for Ashley and Ken, Jr. Comes with minivan in robin-egg blue or white, and cooler filled with doughnut holes and fruit punch.

Mid-life Crisis Barbie -

It's time to ditch Ken.Barbie needs a change, and Alonzo (her personal trainer) is just what the doctor ordered, along with Prozac. They're hopping in her new red Miata and heading for the Napa Valley to open a B&amp;B. Includes a real tape of "Breaking Up Is Hard to Do."

Divorced Barbie -

Sells for $199.99. Comes with Ken's house, Ken's car, and Ken's boat.

Recovery Barbie -

Too many parties have finally caught up with the ultimate party girl. Now she does Twelve Steps instead of dance steps. Clean and sober, she's going to meetings religiously. Comes with a little copy of The Big Book and a six-pack of Diet Coke.

Post-Menopausal Barbie -

This Barbie wets her pants when she sneezes, forgets where she puts things, and cries a lot. She is sick and tired of Ken sitting on the couch watching the tube, clicking through the channels. Comes with Depends and Kleenex. As a bonus this year, the book "Getting In Touch with Your Inner Self" is included.

wolfdancer
12-29-2004, 02:41 PM
Some of them were hilarious!! esp. the divorced Barbie...lol

Chopstick
12-29-2004, 04:16 PM
Don't forget my favorite, <font color="red">Redneck Barbie </font color>

http://www.compfused.com/media/29tvggcc/redneckbarbie.jpg

Barbara
12-29-2004, 04:27 PM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote wolfdancer:</font><hr> I took one of them online quizes, and...learned that after over 40 years of being together...Ken has been dumped, by Barbie, in favor of one of them Aussie, surfer types. Wait'll she finds out the only thing that's up....is the surf<hr /></blockquote>

LOL!!!

Barbara~~~still trying to find out what "Australian Oyster" means... /ccboard/images/graemlins/tongue.gif

wolfdancer
12-29-2004, 04:48 PM
Barbara, he's an oyster "freak" loves 'em...all sizes, all shapes....and he's visited Australia, and seems fascinated with the place. How many good nicknames are there in Vermont, anyway? I wouldn't mind having his tapes though...
I've been there twice on extended visits, from Brisbane,Newcastle, Sydney, Melbourne, Adelaide...to Perth
it is a great country....and one time I got to drink with the Australian American cup crew...as I remember, they drank me under the table, raced the next day ...and lost...

Barbara
12-29-2004, 05:05 PM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote wolfdancer:</font><hr> Barbara, he's an oyster "freak" loves 'em...all sizes, all shapes....

<font color="blue">Jack, for one BD resent Pete took me to the "Samson Street Oyster Bar" in Philly because I love oysters. But I was not prepared at how many different kinds of oysters there are out there. I ordered my fave Bluepoints, and their "Box Oysters". The Bluepoints were great, but the Box Oysters were disgustingly HUGE!! YUCK-O MAJOR TIME!! I had to cut them with a knife! Yo and warning!! They are for desparate people only!! And there were shells in all the oysters, too. I hate that.

So if I want oysters, I go to this little restaurant in South Jersey that has the best raw bar in the metro area, Steak 38. Now you have to make reservations because one food review in the Philly papers put it on the map!</font color>


I've been there twice on extended visits, from Brisbane,Newcastle, Sydney, Melbourne, Adelaide...to Perth
it is a great country....and one time I got to drink with the Australian American cup crew...as I remember, they drank me under the table, raced the next day ...and lost... <hr /></blockquote>

I want to go to Australia along with Figi and Bora Bora and Hawaii. Life was cruel to me this time. I can't stand the mud waters of the Jersey shore. I need to see blue and all of its variations. /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

Barbara

SecaucusFats
12-30-2004, 12:09 AM
What about "Welfare Barbie"?:
http://hometown.aol.com/raveloman/images/welfare%20barbie.jpg

SF

landshark77
12-30-2004, 08:40 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote SecaucusFats:</font><hr> What about "Welfare Barbie"?:
http://hometown.aol.com/raveloman/images/welfare%20barbie.jpg

SF <hr /></blockquote>

Welfare my a$$! Look at her..premium cigs and beer, name brand Mac &amp; Cheese. No welfare broad can afford that junk.

Gayle in MD
12-31-2004, 05:38 PM
Barbara,
If you like oysters, then you two must sail to Ocean City Md. this summer. Ever heard of Chincotinque oysters? They are the best you'll ever have. Tender and salty.
Gayle in Md.