rackmup
05-24-2002, 08:17 AM
What if pool enjoyed the same popularity and marketing as other "mainstream" sports?
Would we:
<ul type="square"> Send our spouses to the mall (or Home Depot) on Sunday afternoon so we could invite our pool playing buddies over for some brews and the "Matches of the Day?"
Serve chips and dip in a bowl shaped like a nineball?
"Chest Bump" everytime our favorite player successfully executes a tough shot?
Sit in a "Miller Lite" promotional inflatable billiards chair (complete with cue notch) while watching pool at home?
"Tailgate" in the parking lot of the host venue for the US OPEN of 9-Ball?
Wear shirts bearing the names of our favorite players?
Go outside between televised matches and shoot a few games in the front yard?
Run to JC Penney to purchase the latest ensemble from the "Keith McCready Color of Money" clothing line?
Watch "Monday Night 9-Ball" with Allen Hopkins, Grady and Dennis Miller (he needs the work) calling the play-by-play?
Be one of 60,000 fans to pay ridiculously inflated prices to ticket scalpers outside the Superdome to watch the "Superbowl of One-Pocket?"
Listen proudly as our High School kids telephone their Grandparents, bragging about how they have been accepted to "The Cue-U College" on a four-year scholarship?
Post pictures of Allison, Ewa and Lee in our garages instead of those bikini-clad gals from the Snap-On tool calender?
Wear brightly colored baseball caps with our favorite players picture and cue images emblazoned on the front?
Watch NASCAR races as Jeff Gordon pulls into the "Victory Circle" in his "Joss West" sponsored Monte Carlo after winning the "Labor Day Mosconi Memorial 500?"
Argue that "The Miz" is in better shape than William "The Frig" Perry was, in his prime?
Watch "FOX Celebrity Boxing" as Miz and Perry beat the bejeezus out of each other?
Have a license plate frame boasting "My other ride is a nineball"?
Fish with a rod made by "Cuetech"?
Shop at the "Spencer's Cues & Gifts" store, sandwiched between the "Victoria's Secret" and "Cinnabon" at the mall?
See bumper stickers on trucks that proclaim: "They will get ball-in-hand when they pry it from my cold, dead fingers"?
See "Cue Racks" mounted in the rear window of those same trucks?
Buy the latest "Swimsuit Issue" of "Cues Illustrated" magazine?
Watch as Buddy "The Rifleman" Hall appears in the "Subway Sandwiches" commercials, slimmed down to 155 pounds, claiming it was the "Chicken Honey Teryaki" subs that helped him lose weight?
Watch a "Midol" commercial as Dixie Carter of Trifecta Entertainment and Jan McWorter, WPBA President, discuss menstrual cramps, bloating and water retention and the subsequent relief the product gives them (McWorter: "I hate when I'm bending down over a shot and my tummy aches from the bloating." Carter: "Have you tried new extra-strength Midol? It sure helps me when I'm all gassy.")
See Dennis Hatch featured on "America's Most Wanted"?
[/list]
Did I miss any?
Regards,
Ken (always dreaming)
Would we:
<ul type="square"> Send our spouses to the mall (or Home Depot) on Sunday afternoon so we could invite our pool playing buddies over for some brews and the "Matches of the Day?"
Serve chips and dip in a bowl shaped like a nineball?
"Chest Bump" everytime our favorite player successfully executes a tough shot?
Sit in a "Miller Lite" promotional inflatable billiards chair (complete with cue notch) while watching pool at home?
"Tailgate" in the parking lot of the host venue for the US OPEN of 9-Ball?
Wear shirts bearing the names of our favorite players?
Go outside between televised matches and shoot a few games in the front yard?
Run to JC Penney to purchase the latest ensemble from the "Keith McCready Color of Money" clothing line?
Watch "Monday Night 9-Ball" with Allen Hopkins, Grady and Dennis Miller (he needs the work) calling the play-by-play?
Be one of 60,000 fans to pay ridiculously inflated prices to ticket scalpers outside the Superdome to watch the "Superbowl of One-Pocket?"
Listen proudly as our High School kids telephone their Grandparents, bragging about how they have been accepted to "The Cue-U College" on a four-year scholarship?
Post pictures of Allison, Ewa and Lee in our garages instead of those bikini-clad gals from the Snap-On tool calender?
Wear brightly colored baseball caps with our favorite players picture and cue images emblazoned on the front?
Watch NASCAR races as Jeff Gordon pulls into the "Victory Circle" in his "Joss West" sponsored Monte Carlo after winning the "Labor Day Mosconi Memorial 500?"
Argue that "The Miz" is in better shape than William "The Frig" Perry was, in his prime?
Watch "FOX Celebrity Boxing" as Miz and Perry beat the bejeezus out of each other?
Have a license plate frame boasting "My other ride is a nineball"?
Fish with a rod made by "Cuetech"?
Shop at the "Spencer's Cues & Gifts" store, sandwiched between the "Victoria's Secret" and "Cinnabon" at the mall?
See bumper stickers on trucks that proclaim: "They will get ball-in-hand when they pry it from my cold, dead fingers"?
See "Cue Racks" mounted in the rear window of those same trucks?
Buy the latest "Swimsuit Issue" of "Cues Illustrated" magazine?
Watch as Buddy "The Rifleman" Hall appears in the "Subway Sandwiches" commercials, slimmed down to 155 pounds, claiming it was the "Chicken Honey Teryaki" subs that helped him lose weight?
Watch a "Midol" commercial as Dixie Carter of Trifecta Entertainment and Jan McWorter, WPBA President, discuss menstrual cramps, bloating and water retention and the subsequent relief the product gives them (McWorter: "I hate when I'm bending down over a shot and my tummy aches from the bloating." Carter: "Have you tried new extra-strength Midol? It sure helps me when I'm all gassy.")
See Dennis Hatch featured on "America's Most Wanted"?
[/list]
Did I miss any?
Regards,
Ken (always dreaming)