Boat Ramp Idiots

[Chopstick]

If you think people drive bad, you should see them driving a boat. Even polite and reasonable people turn into rude and thoughtless idiots when they get into their boats. The paragon of this is the local boat ramp. Even when there's long lines of people waiting to put in or get out, there will be at least one idiot who will pull in and park on the ramp and start screwing around with their boat like the own the ramp.

One summer afternoon I was out fishing and I checked my nav lights and one of them was out so I couldn't stay after dark so I return to the dock at sundown. I know this is always a mistake but I had no choice. I pulled in and tied up to the side dock. The correct procedure is to go to the side dock and leave your boat there while you get your trailer and get in line until it is your turn to retrieve your boat.

I stepped out onto the dock and some guy walks up with a cell phone and asks me for help. He tells me that his friend is out in the channel on a jet ski(idiot radar activates here) with his son and the sun is going down and he doesn't have any lights and he doesn't know where the ramp is. I asked if he doesn't know where the ramp is how'd he get it in there? The guy says Huh? and I said never mind where is he? He's north of the ramp on a midnight blue jet ski. I said I would go get him. Great, I'm looking for a midnight blue jet ski in the dark in a fairly large area. I got out the search light and started looking. Know how I found him. The idiot was cutting a wake in a no wake zone. That attracted my attention. I don't even want to get into all the poles and stuff sticking up out of the water where he was tearing through with his kid, in the dark.

I got them back to the ramp and went and got my trailer. When it came my turn I backed my trailer down the ramp into the water. Right then a boat pulls up to the ramp dock and starts unloading people. That in itself is not unusual. I got my boat off the side dock and pulled around to the ramp and these guys are still sitting there in front of my trailer. So I wait a while wondering what of earth these people can be thinking. Finally they start the motor and cast off. I thought finally, it took them long enough.

Then these two individuals commence to driving their boat up onto my trailer, which of course doesn't fit their boat. My boat is bigger, so their boat turns sideways on my trailer. Being macho latinos they were not going to be deterred so they gun the motor until they get good and stuck. The whole time with me behind them yelling "HEY THAT'S NOT YOUR TRAILER!" I just got finished rebuilding those bunks too. The guys girl friend hears me yelling and comes running down the ramp yelling that's not his trailer and of course women are never right so he starts arguing with her.

I wasn't interested in starting an incident with a boat load of drunk Puerto Ricans but I'd had just about enough. Right then she wins the argument by pointing to my truck and saying "Oh yeah, well that ain't your truck!" Well after some time and effort they manage to get their boat off my trailer. The guy backs up past me. He was snockered. "Sorry man I thought it was my trailer." Yeah, no kidding. They back their trailer into the other side of the ramp. He owned a white Dodge pickup. I own a blue GMC Yukon.

While I was setting my safety chain I heard him on the other side explaining to his girl friend how he was really right after all. "You see, it was his fault for parking his trailer in front of us. He saw the boat it was right there." Right then I would have paid serious money for a tear gas grenade. I settled for getting out of there as fast as I could.

The above story is not unique. You can see the same show at any boat ramp at sun down.

[highsea]

Hehe. I love boat ramp stories. A lifetime around boats, I've seen a lot of strange goings-on at the boat ramp. Sunken boats, sunken trucks, collisions, you name it. I watched a guy launch his ski boat in a lake one time without taking the tie-downs off.

We had a guy drop his sailboat mast on the boat next to him while he was lowering it to get ready for the trailer. He just went around the boat disconnecting all the stays and shrouds, and when there wasn't enough left to hold it up, gravity took charge! Umm...Hello? Anybody home?

My marina is on a river, and there is a drawbridge right next to it. I watched a broker launch a brand new 45' Bayliner on the ramp one day. He floated the boat off the trailer, and the current took him right under the bridge and pinned him against the wing wall. The guy had no clue how to actually drive the boat. I had to get in my skiff and go collect him and bring the boat to the dock.

Then there was the guy who built the houseboat with the motor on the front. The wing wall got him too...

My trick for launching my boat alone was to tie a 20 foot line from the bow eye to the back of the trailer. I'd back down the ramp real quick and hit the brakes as the boat slid off the trailer. I used to get a kick out of watching people laughing as my boat would start floating away without me, sometimes they would start running for the water to grab my boat and "help". Then I'd pull forward a bit and just tow my boat back to the ramp, get out and untie the line, pull the boat up a little, and go park the truck. Never in a hurry, always calm and cool... /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

[moblsv]

<blockquote><font class="small">Quote Chopstick:</font><hr> on a jet ski(idiot radar activates here)<hr /></blockquote> So, true /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

I love boat ramp stories. I've seem fights, submerged trucks and a guy bouncing the trailer down the ramp jack-knifed because we was so frustrated that he couldn't keep it straight. They should put in bleacher seating and sell tickets. /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

[Pelican]

I live across from a boat ramp. Like you said I could put bleachers on my pier and sell tickets. Have had two trunks go down in the past few months. A Silverado and an S-10. Hum, "Like a Rock" /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

[Ross]

My nephew is an avid and experienced boater, but he also thinks he can handle anything. He recently was launching his boat by himself (which he does frequently) and his vehicle somehow ended up being pulled into the lake. I don't remember if it was an issue of the brake not being set right or what - I just remember him telling me that fairly new 30 thousand dollar SUV ended up completely submerged. A bit embarrassing when he had to call his wife to come pick him up and then answer her question "Why?".

[highsea]

That's the difference between having experience and thinking you have experience.

Now he has a little experience.

Tell him my little trick with the rope. You don't have to get out of the cab of the truck until both truck and boat are secured. Little things make big differences. Even if something goes wrong, a floating boat is a $hitload easier to retrieve than a sunken truck.
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[SpiderMan]

<blockquote><font class="small">Quote Ross:</font><hr> My nephew is an avid and experienced boater, but he also thinks he can handle anything. He recently was launching his boat by himself (which he does frequently) and his vehicle somehow ended up being pulled into the lake. I don't remember if it was an issue of the brake not being set right or what - I just remember him telling me that fairly new 30 thousand dollar SUV ended up completely submerged. A bit embarrassing when he had to call his wife to come pick him up and then answer her question "Why?". <hr /></blockquote>

A similar thing happened to one of my co-workers about five years ago. The ramp was fairly steep, and slippery, and his truck didn't have 4wd. He backed a little too far down the ramp, and started spinning/slipping as he tried to come back up. Instead of going forward he slowly but surely slid into the lake until the water came up to about his windows.

I built the trailer for my last fishing boat, and it includes a removable tongue section held by hitch pins. When I needed it, I could pull the pins and insert a seven-foot section of pipe as an extender. That way, I never had to get near the water. Very handy when launching from a plain dirt bank.

SpiderMan

[Chopstick]

That is a good tip about tying off to the trailer. Since I lowered my axles I have to back in too far to launch without getting in the water. I've been looking for a way to launch without having the wade in. The water is starting to get cold.

I beaned a bird with a lure last night. We were casting at a light on the corner of a covered boat dock and I cast a little to far to the left and it went over the corner of the roof. Right then I was thinking I was going to get stuck on the roof my lure shoots out and splashes to the right. We heard this squawk, sqwuak, sqwuak going away into the dark. We fell out laughing.

/ccboard/images/graemlins/laugh.gif /ccboard/images/graemlins/laugh.gif /ccboard/images/graemlins/laugh.gif /ccboard/images/graemlins/laugh.gif

[Perk]

Growing up camping and boating alot, alot of the stories are very funny and nothing that I havent saw before. Same as backing a boat in, I enjoy camping watching someone bring in their new rig! /ccboard/images/graemlins/smile.gif

You can definately tell when someone has the experience, and the person that knows it all!