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SnakebyteXX
09-27-2005, 06:58 AM
[ QUOTE ]
It was 1/05, my mother's cancer had come back with a vengeance. The hysterectomy she had 10 months previous was only a band aid to give her a little more time against the cancer that was rampant throughout her system. She was given 6 months to live at the most. 3 weeks later I was informed by the Hospice people she had contacted that it was time for 24/7 supervision. I had just visited her 2 days before, we celebrated my 32nd birthday. I took her to her hospital appointments, we had some lunch at Black Angus. Those are the last memories I have of my mother being coherent and able.

I hired a nurse and we moved into her apartment. The night before the nurse came I helped my mom out to her porch for her last cigarette. She was dopey and could barely move. She took 2 drags of the cigarette and forgot about it as we sat outside and she watched some kids play. She was smiling, I couldn't tell if she was there or not. I just made sure she was comfy.

That night she slipped into a coma. The hired nurse showed up and I immediately questioned her dosage of meds, we discovered she wasn't really on much. She was flinching uncomfortably, but unable to speak. Her Hospice nurse had made her fill out a "relative pain scale" document, this was my mother's instructions on how much she wanted to be sedated during her last days. She had chosen to be kept completely pain free. The Hospice people brought a hospital bed and oxygen machine and instructed the hired nurse and I on the administration of my mom's meds. Ativan every 4 hours, Morphine Sulphate (20MG/ML) in increasing dosages every 2 hours, 2 morphine patches/day. My mother was going to die and it was my job to make sure she was pain free. The more pain she was in, the more morphine she got and the quicker she would die.

By the 6th day I was giving her 1 ML of morphine every 2 hours. I prayed for my mother's quick death, it was hard to see her in that state, knowing she was never going to wake up. Hospice told me how it would end. It happened exactly the way they described. Eventually the cancer and morphine would shut her kidneys and liver down, her body would become toxic with ammonia and after an intense 4 hours of rapid breathing and intense fighting to stay alive she would die. I held her hand and we listened to her favorite music together as she died in front of me. I didn't want her to be alone. She was 59 and had been smoking since she was 17.

My deepest thanks goes to Hospice. They helped me to help my mother die in her own apartment, peacefully. They are truly angels.

My father is 65, my parents divorced when I was 2. He's been smoking since he was 16. He used to be a strong man, 6 feet tall, 190 pounds. Now he's 5'9 and weighs ~130 pounds. His emphysema is so bad these days that he can't slowly walk 50 feet without having to stop and take a hit off the oxygen tank. He stopped smoking when they prescribed the tank for him a year ago. He doesn't tell me what the doctors are telling him, I know he's hiding the truth. I just try to spend some time with him while I can.

F*cking cigarettes. <hr /></blockquote>




web page (http://www.craigslist.org/eby/rnr/100243278.html)

wolfdancer
09-27-2005, 08:51 AM
I've lost four relatives, aunts and uncles, to smoking related deaths, and I've lost a few friends. They didn't have the info
that's out there now, on the health hazards, risks involved.
And we still have people crying about their "rights"...their right to smoke in public places, being taken away.
This must have been a painful story for you to post, but thanks for posting it. Maybe it'll help someone...

sack316
09-27-2005, 12:38 PM
thank you for posting this and my sympathy for what you and your family have gone through. I feel about an inch tall due to the fact that I came to my computer holding a lit cigarette as I clicked on the link. Sharing your words will not be in vain, hopefully some of them will break through to people like myself eventually.

Cueless Joey
09-27-2005, 02:54 PM
Cigs are evil.
All smokers should sue the tobacco companies for making them addicts.
My mom smokes and has quit twice and gone back to smoking.

SnakebyteXX
09-27-2005, 05:24 PM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote wolfdancer:</font><hr> I
This must have been a painful story for you to post, but thanks for posting it. Maybe it'll help someone...
<hr /></blockquote>

<blockquote><font class="small">Quote sack316:</font><hr> thank you for posting this and my sympathy for what you and your family have gone through. <hr /></blockquote>

Thanks for the concern guys but I did not write that post. I thought putting it in quotes would help make that clear. Sorry if you were mislead.

I do however support fully the sentiment expressed in the post. Smoking kills and it doesn't kill in a pretty way. Losing a loved one to an addictive drug, particularly one as nasty as tobacco is a horrific but preventable tragedy.

Having observed many hard core smokers who managed to quit I would venture to say that quitting cigarettes can be tougher than quitting heroin. Sack, best of luck to you in your ongoing efforts to come to terms with your addictions - perhaps in time you will find the strength and resolve to stop smoking for good. For your sake, and the sake of those who love you - one can only hope.

Snake

sack316
09-27-2005, 10:13 PM
thanks snake, I'm sure as you've seen from me over this last 13 months that I've taken care of several of my demons. Smoking as the last addiction I have left to kick I suppose, just thus far I have yet to find the want and/or willpower to do it all the way. Unfortunately it's the only one that once it gives you a "wake up call" it's already too late.

wolfdancer
09-28-2005, 11:22 AM
somehow the quotation marks are missing from my screen...I shudda known better'n to believe a pool playing Sonomian could be so caring

Cueless Joey
09-28-2005, 11:15 PM
[ QUOTE ]
hello to everyone,

I just wanted to say thanks to everyone that took the time to come over to our house to see G**** over the labor day weekend. G**** REALLY enjoyed seeing everyone. he was talking about it for quite a few days afterwards. he was looking forward to getting back to DK's to play pool. unfortunately that is not meant to be. G***'s cancer has returned with a vengeance and has spread to all areas of his body. the doctors have only given him a few weeks and that was 3 weeks ago. we are praying around the clock for him and we ask that you will do the same for him!! he cannot take anymore phone calls because he can no longer speak.....just know that G****'s loves all of you guys and always has.
GOD BLESS
<hr /></blockquote>
I received this e-mail today.
G is leaving a two-year old and a young beautiful wife who enjoys pool as much as he does. G played barbox pool for decades and was a chain smoker. Very good player and has never whined over a loss. Great gentleman and a great father/husband. He could not however quit smoking. His wife begged him for years. G's father owns a great part of Richard Nixon's hometown, Yorba Linda.
My mother smokes and cannot quit.
Goddfukkin damn cigarettes. She cannot quit it. She fukkin treats them better than food. Buys the freshest boxes and keeps them fridged.
My auntie died of lung cancer last year. Guess why?