PDA

View Full Version : The story of creation



SnakebyteXX
09-27-2005, 02:19 PM
[ QUOTE ]
<font color="blue">



In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the
Earth and populated the Earth with broccoli,
cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow and
red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would
live long and healthy lives.

Then using God's great gifts, Satan created Ben and
Jerry's Ice Cream and Krispy Creme Donuts. And Satan
said, "You want chocolate with that?" And Man said,
"Yes!" and Woman said, "And as long as you're at it,
add some sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds. And
Satan smiled.

And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might
keep the figure that Man found so fair. And Satan
brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar
from the cane and combined them. And Woman went from
size 6 to size 14.

So God said, "Try my fresh green salad." And Satan
presented Thousand-Island Dressing, buttery croutons
and garlic toast on the side.
And Man and Woman unfastened their belts
following the repast.

God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy
vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them." And
Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chicken-fried
steak so big it needed its own platter. And Man gained more weight and his cholesterol went through the roof.

God then created a light, fluffy white cake, named it
"Angel Food Cake," and said, "It is good." Satan then
created chocolate cake and named it "Devil's Food."

God then brought forth running shoes so that His
children might lose those extra pounds. And Satan gave cable TV with a remote control so Man would not have
to toil changing the channels. And Man and Woman
laughed and cried before the flickering blue light and gained pounds.

Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in
fat and brimming with nutrition and Man peeled the
healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into
chips and deep-fried them. And Man gained
pounds.

God then gave lean beef so that Man might
consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite.
And Satan created McDonald's and its
99-cent double cheeseburger. Then said, "You want
fries with that?" And Man replied, "Yes! And super
size them!" And Satan said, "It is good."
And Man went into cardiac arrest.
God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.

Then Satan created the Canadian "Healthcare"
system.

Thought for the day:
There is more money being spent on breast
implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's
research. This means that by 2040, there should be a
large elderly population with perky boobs
and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of
what to do with them.
</font color> <hr /></blockquote> Sorry no link (http://)