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pooltchr
09-29-2005, 04:19 PM
The Cowboy and the Yuppie
>A cowboy was holding his herd in a remotepasture when suddenly a brand-new
>BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him. The driver, a young man in a
>Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses, YSL tie, leans out the window
>and asks the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you
>have in your herd, will you give me a calf?"
>The cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his
>peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure. Why not?"
>The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it
>to his AT&T cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he
>calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get an exact fix on his
>location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area
>in an ultra-high-resolution photo. The young man then opens the digital
>photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in
>Hamburg, Germany. Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot
>that
>the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses a MS-SQL
>database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with hundreds of
>complex formulae. He uploads all of this data via anemailo to his
>Blackberry
>and, after a few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he prints
>out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet
>printer and finally turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1586
>cows and calves."
>"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says the
>cowboy.
>He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on amused as
>the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car. Then the cowboy says to
>the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will
>you give me back my calf?"
>The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"
>"You're a consultant for the Democratic party," says the cowboy.
>"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"
>"No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even
>though
>nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a
>question I never asked; and you don't know anything about my
>business..."Now
>give me back my dog!"
> _____


Just trying to lighten things up a little around here.