View Full Version : Woofing at the Pool Hall

07-13-2002, 08:21 PM
Have you ever heard? these are just a few of the many sayings I've heard.. from time to time and Table to Table.

"Chalks Cheap/Free"... just after you misscued?

When you miss a shot.. your opponent says "Make it easy for me"

Or one of my favorites... "being nice to me?" (right after I miss a shot and leave them "OUT"

"close enough for the women we dance with" after getting "close to your work" another saying.

"Saint Bernard" (dogging it big time.. )

"Don't buy a lottery ticket, you've wasted all your good luck on the pool table"

"Jelly Rolls" or just "Rolls" or being tagged the "Bakery Man" (get all the rolls)

Or just after you miscue.. your opponent says

"I make it a rule to never chalk before I misscue"

Any you care to add?

07-13-2002, 08:30 PM
Need a cough drop?
Are you baiting the hook?

07-13-2002, 08:52 PM
"You're just waiting to jack the bet"

"Christmas in July" (or whatever month is appropriate)

"You are my Santa Claus"

And one that I've actually used, about myself --
"Even a Blind Chicken can find a peck of corn once in a while"

07-13-2002, 09:14 PM
"That'll bring out the Airedale in you."

"If it weren't for _______, you'd be the worst player in the joint."

"Have some of that!"

"This is an unplayable lie. Can I take a drop?"

Q -"Is it my shot?" A - "Do you follow me?"

"If all my strokes were that bad, I wouldn't have a friend in the world."

Chris Cass
07-13-2002, 10:24 PM
That's not very neighborly. I'm not your neighbor.
Your the only friend I got. Looks like your screwed.
Git ya some of that!
hey wingnut



07-13-2002, 11:23 PM
some years ago i used to play chesapeake charlie (from norfolk va)
he was late sixtys or so then just a short quite guy,
always wore a hat never would be be without one

he is a "h___" of a player so effortless his game was 14.1

he would play anything and the more he played
the more we wound up changing his name
he wound up being called " jelly roll"
the harder the shot, the worse the leave, the easier he got shape on the next ball, all the balls seemed to be his
so sweet a game i have never seen since he moved
just saying thanks for reminding me of those times charlie and i played.

bye ...

Voodoo Daddy
07-14-2002, 12:14 AM
"Even a blind squirrel{sp} gets a nut" after the local hacker wins a match

"Stop It"...after a fantastic shot or in my home room...if you REALLY put on a show the rail will scream "WHAT?"

"You look like someone just ran over your dog"..right after you pound the case ball in!

After a real tough out you say; "I wore out 4 cars looking for a guy like you!"

After your opponent dogs it; "Your missed your turn, the vetrenarian is the next block down!"

Voodoo..has many more but will wait a day or two

07-14-2002, 01:28 AM
> One of my personal favorites used to be "Let him in,he's a member!" whenever the cue ball gets close to a pocket. Tommy D.

07-14-2002, 03:34 AM
The one I have used countless times goes like so.... The guy shoots and pots a ball and the cue ball is heading straight for the hole. You yell "Get out of there!!!" as it falls in. Then you yell "OH NO!!!! How unlucky can one guy be??"

Chris Cass
07-14-2002, 06:59 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote: Tommy_Davidson:</font><hr> &gt; One of my personal favorites used to be "Let him in,he's a member!" whenever the cue ball gets close to a pocket. Tommy D. <hr></blockquote>

hahaha Tommy, we change it here to "He's a Moose Member." Private joke. Once we played for the Moose Lodge as a team yrs back. The owner insisted we joined the lodge. Even though the stipulation that the team wouldn't have to join. He just wanted a winning team at the time.

When, I break and make 3 or more balls if lucky I'll say, "Hey, this tables leaking." hahahah


C.C.~~Quit It.......

07-14-2002, 08:13 AM
"Waldo, it costs the same to play on the table" yelled out when someone flies the cueball of the table.

"Hey, does your husband play?" said when a guy makes a weak break (my appologies to the ladies in advance /ccboard/images/icons/smile.gif )

"There's a moment of clarity" when you run right by the obvious best shot or "That was a stroke of genius" or "I think I just had another senior moment"

'Hummmm, you didn't like the dead stop out, huh?" When you give the player BIH and he gets out of line giving it back to you.

Yelling out "FLOCK SHOT" when your about to shuffle the deck in 9-ball or "I'm giving all these balls six chance's "

After you've paid up after a game ask the guy "could you loan me twenty till my hunchback cousin straightens up and pays me what he owes me?"

Yell out, "Hey, dump truck, you wanta play some" to a buddy when he enters the pool hall.

~~~~~geez, don't get me started~~~~ /ccboard/images/icons/smile.gif

07-14-2002, 08:18 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote:</font><hr>'Hummmm, you didn't like the dead stop out, huh?" When you give the player BIH and he gets out of line giving it back to you.<hr></blockquote>

You reply reminded me of one that I haven't heard in a long time.

With Ball in Hand, my opponent misses, and looks at me and says.. "I got left with a bad angle.. "

07-15-2002, 08:26 AM
"YOU SHAPE-SHOOTIN' DEVIL!" (said to someone who just hooked himself)


phil in sofla
07-15-2002, 04:20 PM
After he misses with BIH, you say, 'I guess some bihs are harder than others.'

After a phenomenal shot and/or leave, 'who is he?' or 'who's that good?'

One I've never heard, but may start using, something that evidently Daddy Bush used to say on the golf course, 'Mr. Smooth lines up his shot,' etc.

When he misses a reasonably easy shot and leaves you bad, 'geez, just make the shot-- you don't have to play me safe here!'

When you both take turns missing an open ball: 'that 2 ball is a problem ball.'

When he accidentally rolls out of line and has to shoot a bank: 'perfect shape for the three bank out!'

When a miss banks back and goes in for you: 'one pocket shot.' If he does it, 'stop with that one pocket sh!t already!'

When a shot looks perfect, and just barely doesn't go, 'you must have hit that one bad.'

07-15-2002, 04:28 PM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote: Tom_In_Cincy:</font><hr> Have you ever heard? these are just a few of the many sayings I've heard.. from time to time and Table to Table.
Any you care to add?

being a very sympathetic sort, i have been know to helpfully suggest, after the other guy hooks himself:

"son, if'n i was you i'd track down the s.o.b. what done that to me and whup him."


07-15-2002, 10:16 PM
Miss all you want, I ain't:
playin' you
raisin' the bet.
givin' up weight
your favorite here

I'd rather be lucky than good anyday
Look out, here comes the world's only living heart donor
Etc. etc. etc.

Chris Cass
07-15-2002, 11:06 PM
Back it up and Jack it up? (raising the bet)

That's no hill for a climber.(left your opponent a tough out)

I got mine!(leaving your scotch doubles partner safe)

There he goes, he done lost his mind!(one pocket shot going for broke)

You break like a girl!(your opponent, one pocket break)



Ralph S.
07-16-2002, 08:59 AM
One of my favorites is right after the opponent hooks himself you say: "what are ya gonna do now cookie man?"
Ralph S.

07-16-2002, 10:42 AM
LOL! A lot of good ones here. Generaly, i don't Woof at all as i consider it bad Karma. But when cutting up with friends (as it apeers most of these come from) I have been known to do a pretty entertaining verbal barage.

Some samples....

Who's your Daddy now!!

You HAVE got money don't you? Cuase if you don't, we can quit right now.

You must hate your money.

You better not watch this, or your pace maker might open the security door.

I like kids, but i don't think i could eat a whole one.

"You couldn't play dead in a Western"

"Who lit the fuse on your Tampon?"

This would be really funny if it weren't happening to me.

Your so lousy, playing you is like getting a birthday presant.

A day without pool is like, well, work.

07-16-2002, 02:39 PM
When a player at our local room leaves his opponent jacked up he says, " let`s see how he shoots out of a 2 story window."
When someone hits a ball 100 miles an hour and misses i always say, " must have rolled off."

07-16-2002, 03:04 PM
Getting up after the players you're watching miss a couple of shots - "I can't stand to watch any more of this - I gotta get out of here."

Comments, not really woofs:
After missing a shot you should make: Look around surprised in the direction of the barmaid and ask "Is this thing plugged in?"

After missing badly: "I sure hope I don't miss heaven by that much!"

After lucking in a ball: "Now I see what I'm up to!"

Someone asks about pressure in a money game: "Pressure! What pressure? This ain't nothing. Now playing for bxxxjxx's - that's pressure!

07-16-2002, 04:09 PM
Voodoo: I like the four cars.

A few from my travels:

Bet you five you can't tell which of my eyes is the fake one.

My shrink says I shouldn't play pool, ever.

Man, you sell blood to get this money?

Next time, steal a cue with a tip on it.

Hey, I once shot a guy looked just like you. You ever been to Detroit?

So, are you happier since you had the operation?

--Greetings from the edge.

07-16-2002, 04:21 PM
Hey Chuck.. good to see ya dropping in and contributing..

Woofing in Cincy is an Art..

07-17-2002, 05:25 AM
Two more:

When your opponent misses, you say "I think you might be a natural leftie."

If your opponent has a flashy cue, you say "My grandbaby has a cue like that--got a picture of Barney on it."


07-17-2002, 09:48 AM
After a bad rolled where I've hooked myself...."Now's a good time for me to use my mulligan."

When the OB rattles but doesn't drop...."That's not right AT ALL!"