View Full Version : I'll take Thanksgiving!

11-23-2006, 04:13 PM
You can have Halloween, New Year's, Christmas, Fourth of July, Easter, and
any day dedicated to presidents. You can stack them all up on one side,
and the turkey and I will stand on the other. I'll take Thanksgiving.

It is, to me, exactly what a holiday should be. For one thing, there are
no gifts. You never have to worry about what to get someone for
Thanksgiving or how much to spend.

There are no lectures about "greed" or "commercialization" or how we're
"forgetting the spirit" of Thanksgiving. No way. The spirit of
Thanksgiving is eating. Who could forget that?

Also, there is no "right" place to go on Thanksgiving except home. You
just sit on the couch, or sit at the table, and you laugh and eat and
ta-da, you are credited with knowing the "true meaning" of the holiday.
Also, it comes with a parade!

Did I mention the dressing? Not the turkey dressing. The human dressing.
There isn't any! Oh, sure, maybe you put on a nice pair of pants. Maybe.
but who really dresses up for Thanksgiving? You can celebrate in a
sweatshirt. Can you say that about New Year's Eve?

Thanksgiving doesn't require history known only by some "smarty-pants".
There's no quoting Lincoln or Washington. No reading from the Declaration
of Independence. What do you need to know about Thanksgiving? The
Pilgrims and the Indians had dinner!!!!!!

Thanksgiving never moves. It is always on a Thursday, strategically placed
so that you might as well take off Friday, since Saturday and Sunday are
next, and, while you're at it, m aybe half of Wednesday just to pick up
everyone from the airport. Thanksgiving gets you half a week off. What
does Labor Day get you? Monday?!!

There is no shopping on Thanksgiving, unlike Memorial Day or Presidents
Day. Sure, there are Thanksgiving sales, but you do them on FRIDAY! How
cool is that? Also, there are no masks. You don't beg for candy from
strangers. Nobody eggs your house.

Have I mentioned stuffing? There is no more celebratory food short of
dessert than stuffing. Be honest. When you were young, you couldn't get
enough of it, right? Maybe you hated cranberry sauce, but all kids loved
stuffing. It was everything great about bread and pudding and hot, mushy
food wrapped into one. Tell me you don't still feel that.

Tell me there's anything better than only having to catch up with your
family to feel like you did the holiday proud. Tell me there's anything
easier than passing plates. Tell me there's any better place to appreciate
what you have than in a kitchen filled with good smells.

So let's sum up. No costumes, no presents, no tuxedoes, no time limit, no
guilt trips, and all the food, naps and football you want.

I'll take Thanksgiving. After all, no one tries to sit on the turkey's lap
and ask for an Xbox.

Hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving.

Please pass the gravy........