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S0Noma
12-26-2007, 09:44 PM
Yes, it's that magical time of year again when the Darwin Awards are bestowed, honoring the least evolved among us.

Here is the glorious winner:

1.

When his 38-caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a hold-up in Long Beach , California , would-be robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.

And now, the honorable mentions:

2.

The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat-cutting machine and, after a little shopping around, submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company expecting negligence sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and he also lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.

3.

A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her.

4.

After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.

5.

An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious head wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit.

6.

A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the counter, and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer... $15. [If someone points a gun at you and gives you money, is a crime committed?]

7.

Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his head at the window. The cinder block bounced back and hit the would-be thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. The liquor store window was made of Plexiglas. The whole event was caught on videotape.

8.

As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately, and the woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher. Within minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher. They put him in the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he replied, "Yes, officer, that's her. That's the lady I stole the purse from."

9.

The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a Burger King in Ypsilanti , Michigan , at 5 A.M., flashed a gun, and demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered onion rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast. The man, frustrated, walked away. [*A 5-STAR STUPIDITY AWARD WINNER]

10.

When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor home parked on a Seattle street, he got much more than he bargained for. Police arrived at the scene to find a very sick man curled up next to a motor home near spilled sewage. A police spokesman said that the man admitted to trying to steal gasoline and plugged his siphon hose into the motor home's sewage tank by mistake. The owner of the vehicle declined to press charges saying that it was the best laugh he'd ever had.

In the interest of bettering mankind, please share these with your friends and family... unless of course one of these individuals by chance is a distant relative or long-lost friend. In that case, be glad they are distant and hope they remain lost.

*** Remember... They walk among us!!! *** web page (http://www.blackpeopleone.com/blog/view/id_20/title_the-2007-darwin-awards/)

Gayle in MD
12-27-2007, 09:37 AM
LOL, One is missing, the guy who called the police to report that someone broke in, and among other things, stole a lb. of his pot from his home, /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif I think they then searched his home, and found a bunch of other drug para around. /ccboard/images/graemlins/wink.gif

I always liked the one about the two drunken friends who had their other friend drive them home from a night of drinking, and got pulled over anyway because he was driving so poorly. Seems their chosen designated driver, was blind!

Deeman3
12-27-2007, 09:45 AM
While all the details are not in, it would seem that the guys who may have taunted the tiger in San Francisco and were later attacked, could be possible candidates.

My favorite of all time were the Italian robbers who tunneled under the bank in Milan only to hit under a 50,000 gallon septic system and drown in it when they struck "paydirt."

LWW
12-28-2007, 05:37 AM
Maybe you can make the list next year. We all know you tried hard this year.

http://i12.photobucket.com/albums/a247/lww/p1949b.jpg

Take it from your old pal Smokey the Bear, anyone who thinks
it's cool to overgrow the forest by a factorof 5 and then fight in
court against proper forest husbandry ... thereby ensuring more
frequent and more severe fires ... is DEFINITELY a moonbat.

LWW

S0Noma
12-28-2007, 08:38 AM
Thus speaks a man who wishes for us to believe we must cut down the trees in order to save them.

LOL sparky.

LWW
12-28-2007, 09:14 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote S0Noma:</font><hr> Thus speaks a man who wishes for us to believe we must cut down the trees in order to save them.

LOL sparky.

<hr /></blockquote>
Now THAT is a moonbat statement if ever there was one.

Properly husbanding a forest is definded as keeping a smaller amount of properly spaced trees with minimal combustible brush laying about. Humans know how to do this and have healthy forests.

Moonbats, OTOH, believe that it is best to allow a forest to overgrow and then let nature incinerate it at the first spark.

Ah yes...burn the forests for their own good.

Chalk up a late entry for the 2007 Moonbat of the Year Award quote.

But, this comes from the Goremon Church so why am I surprised?

LWW

moblsv
12-28-2007, 12:38 PM
Just heard one on the local news. This one just barely happened a few miles from my home.

A guy was being chased by police and for some unknown reason, presumably to slow down the cops, he threw his dog out the sunroof. He was tracked down by the dogs rabies vaccination tag and arrested for running from the police and animal cruelty.

wolfdancer
12-28-2007, 02:16 PM
Dee, those were teenagers, and there is no proof they taunted the animals, that I know of. Regardless, the enclosure was not up to standard, and it's a wonder that didn't happen before. Taunting chimps is standard fare at
Zoos for some teens...not a far stretch to see them do it to other animals, and take precautionary steps.
The "trained" staff didn't respond well either....fortunately the police took charge before anybody else was killed.
Taunting or not...it's a tragedy that should have been prevented, and I think the Zoo will be liable for the death.
It would be a "leap" to charge someone there with negligent homicide....but someone dropped the ball.

S0Noma
12-28-2007, 02:19 PM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote LWW:</font><hr>
Properly husbanding a forest is definded as keeping a smaller amount of properly spaced trees with minimal combustible brush laying about. Humans know how to do this and have healthy forests.

LWW <hr /></blockquote>

Ohhhhhhhhhhh... according to you it's all about 'keeping a smaller amount of ... trees' to save the forest?

I get it. That's WAY DIFFERENT than 'cutting down trees to save the forest'. You are SO right!

Thanks for the clarification.

LWW
12-28-2007, 02:36 PM
No, it's called keeping the thickness at a level that Mother Nature DEMANDS, except that we keep it there by keeping the density stable instead of allowing a cycle of overgrowth and burn.

I understand that as even the far left wingers in congress do. You, however, don't understand because you are a moonbat and shriek at the light of truth as you flash back towards the darkness.

LWW

S0Noma
12-28-2007, 02:46 PM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote LWW:</font><hr> No, it's called keeping the thickness at a level that Mother Nature DEMANDS, except that we keep it there by keeping the density stable instead of allowing a cycle of overgrowth and burn.

I understand that blah, blah, blah...

LWW <hr /></blockquote>

What you continually ignore is the GAO Study that indicated over three quarters of those husbanding efforts have gone forward without opposition. &amp; for small fraction that have been litigated? NONE of the lawsuits have carried on past the ninety day limit set by the forestry service.

Which kind of begs the question: Why are you so h_ell bent on blaming ALL forest fires on a lack of proper husbandry when the vast majority are being husbanded just fine?

LWW
12-28-2007, 02:58 PM
Ah, back to the moonbat wordparsing of phrases that a retarded chimp's crack baby could follow.

LWW

S0Noma
12-28-2007, 03:20 PM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote LWW:</font><hr> Ah, back to the moonbat wordparsing of phrases that a retarded chimp's crack baby could follow.

LWW <hr /></blockquote>

Nope, just back to mentioning the facts of record. You know the ones you don't want to face because it doesn't fit your political agenda?

Yeah... them.

LWW
12-28-2007, 05:50 PM
http://www.thepeoplescube.com/images/Complete_Idiots_GlobalWarmi.gif

SODumba's newest study book so
he can have all the latest moonbat
talking points since he can't keep
up with very basic conversation
with anyone possessing an above
room temp IQ.

LWW