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eb_in_nc
04-29-2008, 10:00 AM
Some of these postings honesty seem to be laced with contention, so I thought it would be good to bring some levity to this forum with pool related jokes.

Mine is a quote from George burns:
"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope"

Anyone else care to add to the list?

SKennedy
04-29-2008, 01:13 PM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: eb_in_nc</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Some of these postings honesty seem to be laced with contention, so I thought it would be good to bring some levity to this forum with pool related jokes.

Mine is a quote from George burns:
"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope"

Anyone else care to add to the list?
</div></div>

Good joke and sorry I don't know any "pool" jokes. However, I'm so bad at pool and sex, using a rope just might improve my ability in both!

New2Pool
04-29-2008, 02:15 PM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: SKennedy</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: eb_in_nc</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Some of these postings honesty seem to be laced with contention, so I thought it would be good to bring some levity to this forum with pool related jokes.

Mine is a quote from George burns:
"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope"

Anyone else care to add to the list?
</div></div>

Good joke and sorry I don't know any "pool" jokes. However, I'm so bad at pool and sex, using a rope just might improve my ability in both! </div></div>

Well you can use the rope to advantage in sex but I am not sure how that would benefit you in pool.

SKennedy
04-29-2008, 02:21 PM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: New2Pool</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: SKennedy</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: eb_in_nc</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Some of these postings honesty seem to be laced with contention, so I thought it would be good to bring some levity to this forum with pool related jokes.

Mine is a quote from George burns:
"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope"

Anyone else care to add to the list?
</div></div>

Good joke and sorry I don't know any "pool" jokes. However, I'm so bad at pool and sex, using a rope just might improve my ability in both! </div></div>

Well you can use the rope to advantage in sex but I am not sure how that would benefit you in pool. </div></div>

That's because you obviously haven't seen me shoot any pool! But, when have you seen me have sex?

New2Pool
04-29-2008, 02:24 PM
Always tell your wife the truth.

A lady tells her husband to go to the store to buy some cigarettes.

He walks down to the store only to find it closed. So he goes into a nearby bar to use the vending machine.

At the bar he sees a beautiful woman and starts talking to her.

They have a couple of beers and one thing leads to another and they end up in her apartment.

After they've had their fun, he realizes its 3AM and says, "Oh no, its so late, my wife's going to kill me. Have you got any talcum powder?"

She gives him some talcum powder, which he proceeds to rub on his hands and then he goes home.

His wife is waiting for him in the doorway and she is pretty angry. "Where the hell have you been?"

"Well, honey, it's like this. I went to the store like you asked, but they were closed. So I went to the bar to use the vending machine. I saw this great looking girl there and we had a few drinks and one thing led to another and I ended up in bed with her."

"Oh yeah? Let me see your hands!" She sees his hands are covered with powder and... "You liar!!! You were playing pool again!!!"


*********


Moral of the story : Always tell your wife the truth. She won't believe you anyway.

New2Pool
04-29-2008, 02:25 PM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: SKennedy</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: New2Pool</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: SKennedy</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: eb_in_nc</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Some of these postings honesty seem to be laced with contention, so I thought it would be good to bring some levity to this forum with pool related jokes.

Mine is a quote from George burns:
"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope"

Anyone else care to add to the list?
</div></div>

Good joke and sorry I don't know any "pool" jokes. However, I'm so bad at pool and sex, using a rope just might improve my ability in both! </div></div>

Well you can use the rope to advantage in sex but I am not sure how that would benefit you in pool. </div></div>

That's because you obviously haven't seen me shoot any pool! But, when have you seen me have sex? </div></div>

You just thought your webcam can't be activated remotely.

Bambu
04-29-2008, 04:21 PM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: New2Pool</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Always tell your wife the truth.

A lady tells her husband to go to the store to buy some cigarettes.

He walks down to the store only to find it closed. So he goes into a nearby bar to use the vending machine.

At the bar he sees a beautiful woman and starts talking to her.

They have a couple of beers and one thing leads to another and they end up in her apartment.

After they've had their fun, he realizes its 3AM and says, "Oh no, its so late, my wife's going to kill me. Have you got any talcum powder?"

She gives him some talcum powder, which he proceeds to rub on his hands and then he goes home.

His wife is waiting for him in the doorway and she is pretty angry. "Where the hell have you been?"

"Well, honey, it's like this. I went to the store like you asked, but they were closed. So I went to the bar to use the vending machine. I saw this great looking girl there and we had a few drinks and one thing led to another and I ended up in bed with her."

"Oh yeah? Let me see your hands!" She sees his hands are covered with powder and... "You liar!!! You were playing pool again!!!"


*********


Moral of the story : Always tell your wife the truth. She won't believe you anyway.</div></div>

HaHa, good one New2!

1Time
04-29-2008, 09:26 PM
I hav uh jokke 4 U 2 reed. Sary 4 my bad spelin. I wuz shootin 9-ball an mist dat klas.

eb_in_nc
04-30-2008, 06:40 AM
New2pool, good one. You'd think the guys wife would be checking out his cue tip to see if it was freshly chaulked!

eb_in_nc
04-30-2008, 07:58 AM
Two drunks went into a bar and found the pool table set up for a game.
"Can we have a game?" they asked the bartender.
"Sure, itís all free."
After an hour neither of them had pocketed a ball.
"Lets speed things up," - said the first drunk.
"How?" - asked the other.
"Firstly, lets take the balls out of the rack..."