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S0Noma
11-19-2009, 11:43 PM
Constitution To Be

ESCONDIDO, CA—Spurred by an administration he believes to be guilty of numerous transgressions, self-described American patriot Kyle Mortensen, 47, is a vehement defender of ideas he seems to think are enshrined in the U.S. Constitution and principles that brave men have fought and died for solely in his head.

Kyle Mortensen would gladly give his life to protect what he says is the Constitution's very clear stance against birth control.

"Our very way of life is under siege," said Mortensen, whose understanding of the Constitution derives not from a close reading of the document but from talk-show pundits, books by television personalities, and the limitless expanse of his own colorful imagination. "It's time for true Americans to stand up and protect the values that make us who we are."

According to Mortensen—an otherwise mild-mannered husband, father, and small-business owner—the most serious threat to his fanciful version of the 222-year-old Constitution is the attempt by far-left "traitors" to strip it of its religious foundation.

"Right there in the preamble, the authors make their priorities clear: 'one nation under God,'" said Mortensen, attributing to the Constitution a line from the Pledge of Allegiance, which itself did not include any reference to a deity until 1954. "Well, there's a reason they put that right at the top."

"Men like Madison and Jefferson were moved by the ideals of Christianity, and wanted the United States to reflect those values as a Christian nation," continued Mortensen, referring to the "Father of the Constitution," James Madison, considered by many historians to be an atheist, and Thomas Jefferson, an Enlightenment-era thinker who rejected the divinity of Christ and was in France at the time the document was written. "The words on the page speak for themselves."

According to sources who have read the nation's charter, the U.S. Constitution and its 27 amendments do not contain the word "God" or "Christ."

Mortensen said his admiration for the loose assemblage of vague half-notions he calls the Constitution has only grown over time. He believes that each detail he has pulled from thin air—from prohibitions on sodomy and flag-burning, to mandatory crackdowns on immigrants, to the right of citizens not to have their hard-earned income confiscated in the form of taxes—has contributed to making it the best framework for governance "since the Ten Commandments."

"And let's not forget that when the Constitution was ratified it brought freedom to every single American," Mortensen said.

Mortensen's passion for safeguarding the elaborate fantasy world in which his conception of the Constitution resides is greatly respected by his likeminded friends and relatives, many of whom have been known to repeat his unfounded assertions verbatim when angered. Still, some friends and family members remain critical.

"Dad's great, but listening to all that talk radio has put some weird ideas into his head," said daughter Samantha, a freshman at Reed College in Portland, OR. "He believes the Constitution allows the government to torture people and ban gay marriage, yet he doesn't even know that it guarantees universal health care."

Mortensen told reporters that he'll fight until the bitter end for what he roughly supposes the Constitution to be. He acknowledged, however, that it might already be too late to win the battle.

"The freedoms our Founding Fathers spilled their blood for are vanishing before our eyes," Mortensen said. "In under a year, a fascist, socialist regime has turned a proud democracy into a totalitarian state that will soon control every facet of American life."

"Don't just take my word for it," Mortensen added. "Try reading a newspaper or watching the news sometime."

Link (http://www.theonion.com/content/news/area_man_passionate_defender_of)

sack316
11-20-2009, 02:37 AM
I know someone else like that!

Al Gore: Passionate defender of what he imagines (http://www.billiardsdigest.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=290784#Post290784) /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/smile.gif

Sack

Gayle in MD
11-20-2009, 06:48 AM
Another RW nut who doesn't understand what the founders wanted, and why.

"To each his own." Why can't the religious fanatics leave everyone else alone? Are they THAT unsure of their philosophies, that they have to constantly try to use their subjective religious philosophies as weapons of force and dictation! Religious fanaticism always leads to violence. It matters not, which religion.

/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/crazy.gif

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">"Our very way of life is under siege," said Mortensen, whose understanding of the Constitution derives not from a close reading of the document but from talk-show pundits, books by television personalities, and the limitless expanse of his own colorful imagination. "It's time for true Americans to stand up and protect the values that make us who we are."
</div></div>

No one is better at creating outrage over imaginary injustices or threats than the modern-day right-wing.


No one is better at creating outrage over imaginary injustices or threats than the modern-day right-wing.




No one is better at creating outrage over imaginary injustices or threats than the modern-day right-wing.

pooltchr
11-20-2009, 08:12 AM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Gayle in MD</div><div class="ubbcode-body"> Why can't the religious fanatics leave everyone else alone? </div></div>

I'm thinking maybe for the same reason that you radical left wingers want to impose your ideas on everyone else. The difference is, you guys want to use everyone elses tax dollars to pay for it all!

Steve

wolfdancer
11-20-2009, 12:16 PM
I believe he would make a fine addition to the NPR section here, and would shortly assume the leadership role for the right, which is being hotly contested now by lww,Steve, and llotter, all of whom assume that they is numero uno.
He might also be an inspiration, and role model for the crew at "Club Meds" , er AZBush, where many here can claim dual membership

Gayle in MD
11-20-2009, 12:30 PM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: wolfdancer</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I believe he would make a fine addition to the NPR section here, and would shortly assume the leadership role for the right, which is being hotly contested now by lww,Steve, and llotter, all of whom assume that they is numero uno.
He might also be an inspiration, and role model for the crew at "Club Meds" , er AZBush, where many here can claim dual membership </div></div>

What else can we expect from Sara's "Real America" /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/grin.gif


G.

pooltchr
11-20-2009, 01:20 PM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: wolfdancer</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I believe he would make a fine addition to the NPR section here, and would shortly assume the leadership role for the right, which is being hotly contested now by lww,Steve, and llotter, all of whom assume that they is numero uno.
He might also be an inspiration, and role model for the crew at "Club Meds" , er AZBush, where many here can claim dual membership </div></div>

You are such a jerk. I can't speak for any others, but personally I don't give a rat's a$$ about your imaginary popularity ratings. I don't give a rats a$$ about you.
I do have a passion for the truth, which you and your friends on here seem to take great pains to avoid at all costs.

Leave me out of your childish posts. If you got something to say, be a man and say it directly to me...but be prepared to defend any comments you make.

Jerk!

Steve

Gayle in MD
11-21-2009, 09:15 AM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: wolfdancer</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I believe he would make a fine addition to the NPR section here, and would shortly assume the leadership role for the right, which is being hotly contested now by lww,Steve, and llotter, all of whom assume that they is numero uno.
He might also be an inspiration, and role model for the crew at "Club Meds" , er AZBush, where many here can claim dual membership </div></div>


<span style="color: #000066">I agree. Given that there is a group here who

1.
Voted twice for Bush, eventhough it became evident that he sent our kids to war on lies.

2.
Subscribed to the Reagan/Bush/Bush/cheney theory that "Debts don't matter."

3.
Ignored the fact that our Security here at home has been threatened for decades by our dependence on foreign oil, and getting free of it has been blocked by three Republican Presidents, each of whom have been in bed with oil for decades. Two of them having been in the oil business with the Saudis and the bin Ladens, for decades.

4.
Deny that predictions from over ten years ago, have continued to come true.

5.
Deny that the war in Iraq provided nothing of value to America, except more debts, more shame, more power and recruitment of terrorists, and higher oil prices, with greater Middle East threats from the REAL threats which Bush ignored, and which have grown.

6.
Deny that 9/11, and the Financial meltdown, both happened on Bush's watch, after unprecedented warnings, which Bush ignored, and evaded or redefined, for political purposes.

7.
Deny that dropping more bombs in the Middle East has never been productive.

8.
Proclaim that we should have stayed longer in Vietnam!!!! Could have won if we had!!!! A truly incredibly stupid idea.
9.
Proclaim that our economy should have bounced back by now, from Bush's near Depression! Jobs should be increasing already, and it's Obama's fault that we were already broke before we had to start trying to undo his mess in the M.E., and prevent a complete global meltdown, with unprecedented deficits left from Bush, which are on-going, both in interest to his debts, and in failure of his foreign policies.

10.
Deny that the future belongs to the country which addresses and gears up for energy technology, clean fuel, and renewable energy, but instead, prescribe to "Drill baby Drill" Totally insane!

11.
Pooh pooh Scientific evidence from every single industrialized nation in the world, regarding the dangerous threats of from Global Warming! INCREDIBLE!

And now this one synches it. Stated that Democratics were afraid of Sara Palin!!!


BWA HA HA HA....

Hey, if we were to set out to locate the dumbest group of uneducated Americans we could find, we wouldn't have to look very far!

G.
</span>

pooltchr
11-21-2009, 09:58 AM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Gayle in MD</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
Hey, if we were to set out to locate the dumbest group of uneducated Americans we could find, we wouldn't have to look very far!

G.
[/color] </div></div>

Nope! You would only need to find a mirror!

Steve

Qtec
11-21-2009, 10:27 AM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">"Right there in the preamble, the authors make their priorities clear: 'one nation under God,'" said Mortensen, attributing to the Constitution a line from the Pledge of Allegiance, which itself did not include any reference to a deity until 1954. "Well, there's a reason they put that right at the top."

"Men like Madison and Jefferson were moved by the ideals of Christianity, and wanted the United States to reflect those values as a Christian nation," continued Mortensen, referring to the "Father of the Constitution," James Madison, considered by many historians to be an atheist, and Thomas Jefferson, an Enlightenment-era thinker who rejected the divinity of Christ and was in France at the time the document was written. "The words on the page speak for themselves."

According to sources who have read the nation's charter, the U.S. Constitution and its 27 amendments do not contain the word "God" or "Christ." </div></div>

If it wasn't so true it would be funny. /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/grin.gif

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Ah, Saturday at last. Time for another Idiot of the Week award. Let's get to it.

When I first heard that Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-MN) was calling for her teabagging supporters to converge on the Capitol to intimidate anyone who might actually support affordable health care, I knew there would be some idiocy on display. Would I have to honor Bachmann yet again in this series? It certainly looked like it. But then someone else would step forward at the last minute to take the prize. </div></div>

Kyle Mortensen = GOP politician = Tea Party twit (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3zWDArXortc)

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Idiot of the Week award goes to Rep. John Boehner (R-OH). What did our winner do to deserve this award? As House Minority Leader, making him a prominent Republican leader in Congress, Rep. Boehner should have known better than to participate in Rep. Bachmann's embarrassing protest. She is well known for her crazy, but Boehner is supposed to be respectable and represent the GOP establishment rather than the fringe. By speaking at her teabagger rally on the Capitol steps, he wholeheartedly embraced her particular brand of crazy and signaled that this is the modern Republican party. <span style='font-size: 20pt'>Let him be known not just for his bad spray tan or tendency to sob like Glenn Beck but also for willingly associating himself with birther nutjobs comparing health care to Nazi concentration camps.

And yet, this was not enough for Rep. Boehner. During his speech, he proudly displayed a copy of the U.S. Constitution and quoted from it. <u>The problem was, it was not the Constitution he was quoting from but the Declaration of Independence. An honest mistake for you and me, but this is a powerful Congressman who is supposed to know something about our Constitution.</u></span>
</div></div>

LMAO

Q

Gayle in MD
11-21-2009, 10:43 AM
/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/laugh.gif

Too much time in the tanning booth! LMAO!

The leader!

OMG!

/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/eek.gif

jayalley
11-21-2009, 08:41 PM
Gayle,

You won't want to miss the new Holocaust Denial thread on Amazon...to the casual reader here, this is a topic (Jew bashing...double loyalties, Jew war profiteers, blah, blah, blah...) that Gayle occasionally likes to bare her ugly side on.
It is a better insight into her darker resentments than her pious self-righteous postings in most of her threads. (Though I have noticed her becoming a bit more shrill recently.)

pooltchr
11-21-2009, 09:29 PM
just recently??????????

/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/grin.gif

Steve

llotter
11-22-2009, 12:14 PM
Kyle has my vote.

wolfdancer
11-22-2009, 04:36 PM
Read my pm to you...and here's the abridged version without the expletives.....
"Physician, heal thyself"
Don't order me what I can one can not post...if you have a problem, you already have experience reporting someone to the admin.
If you are making an implied threat though,to me, for my replying in kind to your posts...well now, that is a horse of a different color. You regularly reply to others,with included insults about Gayle, or myself, and now you are ordering me to "man up? ....***

wolfdancer
11-22-2009, 04:49 PM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a democrat. Sorry for being redundant... </div></div>
And supposen even more....that you were too dumb to know the difference between the two?

Gayle in MD
11-23-2009, 02:25 PM
/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/laugh.gif /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/wink.gif

pooltchr
11-23-2009, 02:43 PM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: wolfdancer</div><div class="ubbcode-body"> <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a democrat. Sorry for being redundant... </div></div>
And supposen even more....that you were too dumb to know the difference between the two? </div></div>

In moswt cases, there is very little difference.

Steve

eg8r
11-23-2009, 04:39 PM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">"Don't just take my word for it," Mortensen added. "Try reading a newspaper or watching the news sometime."
</div></div>LOL, best imitation of Gayle, EVER! /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/smile.gif

eg8r