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Gayle in MD
02-09-2010, 07:48 AM
Subject: The Amazing Italian

A salesman drove into a small town where a circus was playing. There was a sign posted that said: DON'T MISS THE AMAZING ITALIAN!

Sounding interesting enough, the salesman bought a ticket and went to the circus and took a seat. There, under the big top, in the center ring, was a table with three walnuts on it. Standing next to it was an old Italian man.

Suddenly, the old man dropped his pants, whipped out his huge male member, and smashed all the walnuts with three mighty swings!

The crowd erupted in applause and the elderly Italian was carried off on their shoulders.

Fifteen years later the salesman happened upon the same little town, found the same circus, and saw one of the same faded signs that read: DON'T MISS THE AMAZING ITALIAN!

He couldn't believe the old guy was still alive much less still doing his act!

He bought a ticket. Again, the center ring was illuminated. This time however, instead of walnuts, three coconuts were placed on the table.

The old Italian stood before them, then suddenly dropped his pants and smashed the coconuts with three swings of his amazing member.

The crowd went wild!

Flabbergasted, the salesman requested a meeting with the Italian after the show.

"You're incredible," he told the Italian, "But, I must ask, I saw your act 15 years ago & you were using walnuts. Why the switch from walnuts to coconuts?"

The Italian answered, "My eyes aren't what they used to be".
/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/laugh.gif

Disclaimer:

This jike was sent by onr of my Italian (male) cousins, who is full Italian, to me, half Italian, and we both think it is hilarious, so if you can't take a joke, you must be a radical RW POS!

/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/laugh.gif

sack316
02-09-2010, 01:14 PM
/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/smile.gif

Sack

pooltchr
02-09-2010, 02:07 PM
More off color, ethnic humor from the PC police!

/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/crazy.gif

Steve

LWW
02-09-2010, 02:09 PM
Why the venom sister Gayle?

And what did including Italian add to the joke?

Because your cousin is insensitive to Franco-Americans is no excuse IMHO ... if he jumped off a bridge would you jump off the same bridge?

Are we not adults here, and can't we all take responsibility for our actions?

And thanks so much for acknowledging that I am a Real World Person Of Sensibility.

I try so hard, and bless you for noticing.

LWW

wolfdancer
02-09-2010, 08:36 PM
So, let me see if I understand this ......
you and tchr are grossly offended by some mild joke about Italians, even morally outraged, I take it.....yet, you write some sexually offensive lies about Stretch, and that other phony **** thinks that is OK.
Neither of you two should have any credence after that....
Both of you post here for the same reasons....to insult others, while trying to pass yourselves off as something you ain't, and you ain't sh*t, which oddly enough means you iz...(imo)
Growing up in an Irish/Polish neighborhood, we called each other by the usual ethnic names, yet went to school and played sports together. I don't know who you think you are sh*tting besides each other....maybe johnnyD (another of your web identities, or do you just send him what to post?)

pooltchr
02-09-2010, 10:59 PM
I wasn't personally offended by the joke. I was simply surprised that someone who is so vocal about others not being politically correct on this forum would post and ethnic joke.
It's the hypocracy that I find troubling, not the joke.

Steve

LWW
02-10-2010, 02:22 AM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: wolfdancer</div><div class="ubbcode-body">So, let me see if I understand this ......
you and tchr are grossly offended by some mild joke about Italians, even morally outraged, I take it.....yet, you write some sexually offensive lies about Stretch, and that other phony **** thinks that is OK.
Neither of you two should have any credence after that....
Both of you post here for the same reasons....to insult others, while trying to pass yourselves off as something you ain't, and you ain't sh*t, which oddly enough means you iz...(imo)
Growing up in an Irish/Polish neighborhood, we called each other by the usual ethnic names, yet went to school and played sports together. I don't know who you think you are sh*tting besides each other....maybe johnnyD (another of your web identities, or do you just send him what to post?) </div></div>

I told no lies about brother stretch.

On more than one occasion he expressed homoerotic desires about me being his "BITCHBOY" ... all I did was rebuff him. I hope that my rejection of his advances didn't cause any emotional damage to him.

Being the age that I am, and having watched numerous relationships start and stop over the years ... I'm curious as to whether your anger over this is possibly jealousy that brother stretch didn't make such advances towards you?

Perhaps the two of you should get together for a cosmopolitan or a velvet hammer and just talk.

Bless you both, you have so much in common.

LWW

LWW
02-10-2010, 02:24 AM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: pooltchr</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I wasn't personally offended by the joke. I was simply surprised that someone who is so vocal about others not being politically correct on this forum would post and ethnic joke.
It's the hypocracy that I find troubling, not the joke.

Steve </div></div>
http://mayflowerstudentblog.files.wordpress.com/2009/10/bigstockphoto_hammer_striking_nail_w_sparks_333329 .jpg

LWW

Stretch
02-10-2010, 04:48 AM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: LWW</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: wolfdancer</div><div class="ubbcode-body">So, let me see if I understand this ......
you and tchr are grossly offended by some mild joke about Italians, even morally outraged, I take it.....yet, you write some sexually offensive lies about Stretch, and that other phony **** thinks that is OK.
Neither of you two should have any credence after that....
Both of you post here for the same reasons....to insult others, while trying to pass yourselves off as something you ain't, and you ain't sh*t, which oddly enough means you iz...(imo)
Growing up in an Irish/Polish neighborhood, we called each other by the usual ethnic names, yet went to school and played sports together. I don't know who you think you are sh*tting besides each other....maybe johnnyD (another of your web identities, or do you just send him what to post?) </div></div>

I told no lies about brother stretch.

On more than one occasion he expressed homoerotic desires about me being his "BITCHBOY" ... all I did was rebuff him. I hope that my rejection of his advances didn't cause any emotional damage to him.

Being the age that I am, and having watched numerous relationships start and stop over the years ... I'm curious as to whether your anger over this is possibly jealousy that brother stretch didn't make such advances towards you?

Perhaps the two of you should get together for a cosmopolitan or a velvet hammer and just talk.

Bless you both, you have so much in common.

LWW </div></div>


Nice one Bitchboy, so you know your name now. That`s so nice. But it`s not like you hoped. Your my BB because i can make you respond at my slightest whim. Your predictablity ammuses me. /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/smile.gif Time for my blessing!

LWW
02-10-2010, 05:26 AM
I will always respond with an offer of friendship to you brother stretch.

You are one of God's children, although you are slow to comprehend the concept that I simply am not interested in your advances.

You already have a wife, and now apparently a new boy friend ... please, keep yourself satisfied and let others be.

Bless you all brother stretch.

LWW

hondo
02-10-2010, 12:47 PM
May I copy this when you start up with your Hillbilly jokes on AZ?

You really do need to be exposed, not that it would
matter to your loyal minions on there.

My friend, if you were just honest, you get the respect you crave on here.
But, I rarely ever see an honest post from you.

Christian, heal thyself. BOOO!

hondo
02-10-2010, 12:48 PM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: pooltchr</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I wasn't personally offended by the joke. I was simply surprised that someone who is so vocal about others not being politically correct on this forum would post and ethnic joke.
It's the hypocracy that I find troubling, not the joke.

Steve </div></div>


BULLSH*T!

hondo
02-10-2010, 12:51 PM
Let's settle this. I am positive that Stretch is not gay
and I have my doubts that you are.
At least I don't believe you've come out of the closet.

Hope that helps, guys.

hondo
02-10-2010, 12:54 PM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: LWW</div><div class="ubbcode-body">

You already have a wife, and now apparently a new boy friend ...

LWW </div></div>

My friend, I have seen nothing in his posts for you to get your hopes up.

Move on ,buddy. There's other fish in the sea.

pooltchr
02-10-2010, 12:57 PM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: hondo</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: pooltchr</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I wasn't personally offended by the joke. I was simply surprised that someone who is so vocal about others not being politically correct on this forum would post and ethnic joke.
It's the hypocracy that I find troubling, not the joke.

Steve </div></div>


BULLSH*T! </div></div>

I'm sorry if you can't handle the truth, but that is the entire point of my post. If someone is going to play the PC card on everyone else, they better be prepared to be following the same rules.
Simple concept. You should be able to grasp it.

Steve

llotter
02-10-2010, 01:00 PM
By identifying the performer as Italian adds to the veracity to the story. Nobody would believe it if he were French or English.

hondo
02-10-2010, 01:20 PM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: llotter</div><div class="ubbcode-body">By identifying the performer as Italian adds to the veracity to the story. Nobody would believe it if he were French or English. </div></div>


This moron gets on the forum... Wait, you're right.
" Douchebag" works just as well. /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/grin.gif

wolfdancer
02-10-2010, 01:55 PM
again.... I am amazed at the power of the written word, and how much clarity can be expressed in the brevity of a single word reply.
"Bullsh*t"....I shall try and remember that to use in any future replies to tchr....

LWW
02-10-2010, 02:06 PM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: pooltchr</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: hondo</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: pooltchr</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I wasn't personally offended by the joke. I was simply surprised that someone who is so vocal about others not being politically correct on this forum would post and ethnic joke.
It's the hypocracy that I find troubling, not the joke.

Steve </div></div>


BULLSH*T! </div></div>

I'm sorry if you can't handle the truth, but that is the entire point of my post. If someone is going to play the PC card on everyone else, they better be prepared to be following the same rules.
Simple concept. You should be able to grasp it.

Steve </div></div>

Please be gentle brother steve.

Brother wolf has spent years in the darkness being told what to believe and what not to believe.

Throwing too much truth and logic at him all at once is like shining a searchlight in a man's eyes after being trapped in a cave for a year. It simply overpowers their senses until they get adjusted.

Try simpler concepts like "Gayle made fun of a person because of their ethnic heritage, that is bad. Gayle made fun of others for the same sin she committed, that is bad also. Put both together and it is really really bad!"

I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive his vulgarity, and help him to become the loving soul we all know he can be.

LWW

hondo
02-10-2010, 07:07 PM
Im trying to be more succinct in my responses.

Gayle in MD
02-10-2010, 08:05 PM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: hondo</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Let's settle this. I am positive that Stretch is not gay
and I have my doubts that you are.
At least I don't believe you've come out of the closet.

Hope that helps, guys. </div></div>

WHAT!!!!

The Little Wonkie Weenie isn't gay????

Are you sure?!!!

I disagree!

Women can always tell, you know.
/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/laugh.gif

hondo
02-10-2010, 08:42 PM
I did get curious when he was describing his body to Stretch.

That was kinda gay.

Gayle in MD
02-10-2010, 08:43 PM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: hondo</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I did get curious when he was describing his body to Stretch.

That was kinda gay. </div></div> /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/smirk.gif

Yep! Knew it all along!....

G.

Stretch
02-10-2010, 10:19 PM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: LWW</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: pooltchr</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: hondo</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: pooltchr</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I wasn't personally offended by the joke. I was simply surprised that someone who is so vocal about others not being politically correct on this forum would post and ethnic joke.
It's the hypocracy that I find troubling, not the joke.

Steve </div></div>


BULLSH*T! </div></div>

I'm sorry if you can't handle the truth, but that is the entire point of my post. If someone is going to play the PC card on everyone else, they better be prepared to be following the same rules.
Simple concept. You should be able to grasp it.

Steve </div></div>

Please be gentle brother steve.

Brother wolf has spent years in the darkness being told what to believe and what not to believe.

Throwing too much truth and logic at him all at once is like shining a searchlight in a man's eyes after being trapped in a cave for a year. It simply overpowers their senses until they get adjusted.

Try simpler concepts like "Gayle made fun of a person because of their ethnic heritage, that is bad. Gayle made fun of others for the same sin she committed, that is bad also. Put both together and it is really really bad!"

I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive his vulgarity, and help him to become the loving soul we all know he can be.

LWW </div></div>

Bitchboy, your concern for Wolf is so very heart warming. Also, your ernest blessings serve as a constant source of inspiration for us. Thankyou......"snap" St.

DickLeonard
02-11-2010, 12:00 AM
SSSSSSSSSSttttttttttrrrrrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeetttttt tcccccchhhhhhh Where the hell have you been don't tell me you been happily married all these years. Dick

Stretch
02-11-2010, 12:32 AM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: DickLeonard</div><div class="ubbcode-body">i might never retire lolWhere the hell have you been don't tell me you been happily married all these years. Dick </div></div>

Dick my friend wow this is a great day! nice to see you and yes still Married. I'm even with the same Company. They have me driving the big rigs now resupplying our Branch Plants arround the Province. Great gig, 3 day week. I might never retire at this rate! I heard you had some health issues. Sure hope your doing ok and we'll see more of you. Your knowledge of Pool, and life in general still inspire me. Take care buddy. St.

Gayle in MD
02-11-2010, 07:44 AM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: DickLeonard</div><div class="ubbcode-body">SSSSSSSSSSttttttttttrrrrrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeetttttt tcccccchhhhhhh Where the hell have you been don't tell me you been happily married all these years. Dick </div></div>

Hello dear! Great to hear from you!

Just wanted to tell you, and my other friends here, that we celebrated our forty-seventh wedding anniversary this week. /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/laugh.gif We were snowed in, but had a fine celebration. /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/wink.gif

Here's a thought for the day, from another great man, like my good liberal friends on this forum!

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">"If by a “Liberal” they mean someone who looks ahead and not behind, someone who welcomes new ideas without rigid reactions, someone who cares about the welfare of the people — their health, their housing, their schools, their jobs, their civil rights, and their civil liberties — someone who believes we can break through the stalemate and suspicions that grip us in our policies abroad, if that is what they mean by a “Liberal,” then I’m proud to say I’m a “Liberal.” ~ John F. Kennedy, 1960

</div></div>

Love,
Gayle XOXOXO

LWW
02-11-2010, 09:51 AM
That is such a beautiful quote sister gayle.

Much like brother John Fitzgerald Kennedy ... if you mean being hard on crime, strong on defense, in favor of lower taxes, being pro business, and keeping the state from meddling in everyone's affairs, well those are traditional liberal values.

It's a ding diddly darned shame that these "PROGRESSIVES" have hijacked liberalism and made it a movement of wealth confiscation, pro death, anti freedom, and hate.

I stand with brother JFK and am also a proud liberal like him.

Bless you for sharing that quote sister gayle.

LWW

wolfdancer
02-11-2010, 02:31 PM
Damn fool, can't let one of your posts go by, without trying to demean it, and in another of his twisted posts....he accuses someone else of being a cyber-stalker...WTF.
In fact, you gots two dingbats stalking yer posts. On one hand you should be grateful that they are trying to edukate themselves, by reading yer material...."another side of the coin" so to speak, from the bigoted bs that Fox puts out....but then as they try to filter what you have done writ, through their Fox fixated minds....they deny the truths that you present for them...
I have abandoned all hope for them

hondo
02-11-2010, 03:09 PM
When all else fails,
we can whip the horses' eyes,
and make them bleed. Jim Morrison

wolfdancer
02-11-2010, 03:43 PM
/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/mad.gif /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/mad.gif

hondo
02-11-2010, 03:56 PM
I wasn't talking about you.

wolfdancer
02-11-2010, 04:20 PM
I knew that...I was just putting a face to Jim's anger....

hondo
02-11-2010, 10:09 PM
/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/grin.gif /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/grin.gif

hondo
02-14-2010, 10:19 PM
BTW, LWW has been on AZ characterizing West Virginians as dumb hillbillies and Klansmen so his righteeous indignanation over an Italian joke is pure crap.

DickLeonard
02-14-2010, 11:35 PM
Gayle I will be married 46 years this year, as my grandfather would say you can get used to anything even hanging if you hang long enuff.####

pooltchr
02-15-2010, 08:16 AM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: hondo</div><div class="ubbcode-body">BTW, LWW has been on AZ characterizing West Virginians as dumb hillbillies and Klansmen so his righteeous indignanation over an Italian joke is pure crap. </div></div>

Don't know where he could have come up with that. I thought everybody knew that the annual Hillbilly Days festival is held in Pikeville, KY!!! That's at least 20 miles from West Virginia!

Steve

hondo
02-15-2010, 12:37 PM
My point, Steve , is that he's the same hypocrite who attacked an Italian lady for telling an Italian joke.

If I remember right, you did too.

But I saw no such condemnation of Dub's hate posts on AZ by you.

I'm starting to get you down pretty good. BOOO.

pooltchr
02-15-2010, 01:44 PM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: hondo</div><div class="ubbcode-body">

I'm starting to get you down pretty good. BOOO. </div></div>

Not even close!

Steve

hondo
02-15-2010, 03:20 PM
Closer than I want to, actually.

So, how'd you do on the neo-con list on AZ?

The only two who evaluated themselves so far were Alan and Ugotda7 and they scored about 80% and fudged on a few answers IMHO.

You fit right in with that crew, bro.

You, LWW, AVmaster, Ugotda7, Bamadawg,Lotter, Punter, Classiccue,
Big John,Sliderule, Alan, poor ole Cuejoey, ain't no difference between the crew.

Put all of you in a huge bag, shake you, and empty the bag, and you'd all fall out at the same time.

I admit that I thought diffently of you at one time.
I had you in a conservative niche with guys like Sack
and Deeman.
No more. You're neo-con through and through.

And that's not a compliment, trust me.

wolfdancer
02-15-2010, 03:36 PM
NOW YOU HAVE DONE IT; angered the sleeping giant.....expect to be smitten with a scathing reply, that will have you quaking in your boots.
Dee and I will never agree on the price of Tea in China, but he writes his own views and disagreements with others out, without the petty put downs of others, and without anger.
I'm buttering him up, so that he will select me to test drive the new Kia Concept car...The Ray!!!!
Kia Ray (http://content.usatoday.com/communities/driveon/post/2010/02/kia-ray-may-be-the-only-exciting-car-at-chicago-show/1)

hondo
02-15-2010, 03:40 PM
WOW! It's certainly different! I like.

pooltchr
02-15-2010, 03:47 PM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: hondo</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
I admit that I thought diffently of you at one time.
I had you in a conservative niche with guys like Sack
and Deeman.
No more. You're neo-con through and through.

And that's not a compliment, trust me. </div></div>

Oh dear! How will I be able to sleep at night knowing how you feel about me?

Probably, just fine.

Steve

hondo
02-15-2010, 04:38 PM
No conscience? Color me shocked. /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/smirk.gif

hondo
02-15-2010, 04:40 PM
BTW, the fact that you deny nothing I say is very telling.

Another conservative turns into a hate-mongering neo-con.

So sad.

ugotda7
02-21-2010, 04:23 AM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: hondo</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Closer than I want to, actually.

So, how'd you do on the neo-con list on AZ?

The only two who evaluated themselves so far were Alan and Ugotda7 and they scored about 80% and fudged on a few answers IMHO.

You fit right in with that crew, bro.

You, LWW, AVmaster, Ugotda7, Bamadawg,Lotter, Punter, Classiccue,
Big John,Sliderule, Alan, poor ole Cuejoey, ain't no difference between the crew.

Put all of you in a huge bag, shake you, and empty the bag, and you'd all fall out at the same time.

I admit that I thought diffently of you at one time.
I had you in a conservative niche with guys like Sack
and Deeman.
No more. You're neo-con through and through.

And that's not a compliment, trust me. </div></div>


Your irrational obsession is unhealthy.

JohnnyD
02-21-2010, 08:38 PM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: hondo</div><div class="ubbcode-body">No conscience? Color me shocked. /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/smirk.gif </div></div>This is a racist comment.Not good hondo.