View Full Version : overcoming anger

08-19-2002, 09:00 AM
Hello people!
Its been some time since my last post here. Today I dont have any problem as usual, just experience from recent tournament... /ccboard/images/icons/smile.gif
On Saturday I went to tournament with quite strong field. It had a very interesting format as there was a coin toss before every match to say if the game was going to be 9-ball or 8-ball. It was my destiny to play 8-ball all the time.... /ccboard/images/icons/frown.gif I like 9-ball much more than 8-ball but I enjoy 8-ball as well. My game was quite strong which was mainly displayed in quarterfinals by 5 runouts in race to 7 (7-0). But in semifinals it was a bit different story. Well..I was still playing good but I made 3 mistakes which I shouldnt have made. Noone got more than 1 game ahead in that match. Hill-hill situation: opponent breaks and nothing falls in; tough position on the table as there are two clusters of stripes and solids; after a moment of consideration I decide to make an attempt to runout; I break those clusters well but got little short on position on last ball before black; sharp angle on middle pocket...nowhere else to play that bitch...I made my best attempt to play that ball...ball went in but due to not-so-perfect followthrough (caused by nervousity) position went short and I was forced to play bank shot on black...hit that one but was unlucky as cueball scratched....and my opponent carefully makes it over hill. Man I was .........well........UNHAPPY /ccboard/images/icons/frown.gif
But thats not the end of story. There was a match for 3-rd place ahead of me....and I was told to play that match right after that lost semifinal battle. Well....i made that stupid mistake to play that match without proper pause of lets say 10-15 minutes. So my mind was still influenced by that lost match. And my opponent took advatage of that. In a few minutes I was trailing 0-3. At this moment I realized that I must leave my anger behind as fast as possible or I would lose. Well.....that was the hardest battle of that tournament...opponent playing great....my mind clouded by storm of anger....MAN....I had to work REALLY hard to return into the match....in fact it was almost late as MY game returned while score was 3-6 in race to 7... well...what to say....I WON!!! Its never late for comeback.... /ccboard/images/icons/smile.gif
This tournament tought me that even if the anger finds somehow a way into your mind you CAN and you MUST get rid of it as fast as possible. and no matter how good or bad you play in one match it doesnt matter in the other...

P.s.: My sponsor is quite happy with my performance and my improvement in last months as I am able to get enough pricemoney.... /ccboard/images/icons/smile.gif /ccboard/images/icons/smile.gif /ccboard/images/icons/smile.gif

08-19-2002, 09:17 AM
Marek, awesome for you shaking it off and placing high in the tournament. Sometimes we forget it's one ball, one game, one match at a time. Don't be angry at the balls, they just did what you told them to do. Don't be angry with yourself, you aren't perfect.

Kato~~~If I got angry everytime I screwed up I'd have a brain meltdown.

Rich R.
08-19-2002, 09:51 AM
Marek, it seems that you learned much from both your defeat and your win. I hope you continue to do well.
Keep us posted on your tournament adventures. I enjoy reading them and it gives us all some insight on pool in your part of the world.
Rich R.

08-19-2002, 10:21 AM
'Pool is a game, games are fun"

one never looses a match. even if the other one wins technically in their eyes, we win by the experience or lessons we receive. what good is it to play a lessor player, when i dont even have to play my best pool and still come out on top. that just makes me sloppy


08-19-2002, 10:35 AM
Marek - Congratulations on cashing!! It's hard to remember that the only shot we can control is the next one - the last shot, game, match is gone - history. It's difficult to wipe away the anger and frustration of a disappointing performance, especially in tournament-pressure situations. Congratulations on doing it so well - Best wishes for the future -

Walt in VA

9 Ball Girl
08-19-2002, 10:45 AM
If I get pi$$ed off during a tourney and I have to play another match, I just start to think that it's me against the table and the balls are going to do what I want them to do. My opponent is only a person to kill time with.

08-19-2002, 11:55 AM

08-20-2002, 01:37 AM
Yeah, I know exactly what you mean... /ccboard/images/icons/smile.gif It works but it drains you out of mental power.... so I think its better to leave my emotions (bad or good) behind and play emotionless pool (when possible). Maybe it takes a little bit of joy from my game but it REALLY adds some consistency to it which gives me much more joy on the other hand... /ccboard/images/icons/smile.gif thx for input anyway!

08-20-2002, 01:38 AM
Hey! thats a good one!!! I ll try that for sure!!! /ccboard/images/icons/smile.gif

08-20-2002, 01:39 AM
Thx Walt!

08-20-2002, 01:40 AM

08-20-2002, 01:44 AM
Dont worry Rich R.! There are going to be lot of tournys in few weeks here so there will be lots of stories to tell (and not to tell as well).... /ccboard/images/icons/smile.gif /ccboard/images/icons/smile.gif /ccboard/images/icons/smile.gif

08-20-2002, 02:07 AM
Well....I am not perfect.....thats the thing i need to say to myself all the time...because If I dont that "I-am-genious-and-accept-nothing-but-perfection" thing starts to grow in my mind like cancer!!! thats my biggest problem as I am quite ambitious guy....and sometimes I really play almost perfect pool so its easy for me to believe that I really am almost perfect /ccboard/images/icons/smile.gif ...and when I dont play so-perfect pool I become angry at myself...so I MUST say to myself all the time: "You are NOT perfect, you MUST accept your mistakes!"
Just yesterday I used quite masochistic practice to wipe this "perfect" thing out of my mind. I got a little problem: sometimes (which means quite often /ccboard/images/icons/smile.gif ) I forget that i need to go to WC to relieve myself - I just dont realize it until its a problem to my game as the tension grows my game is fading quickly away. Same thing happened yesterday. When I realized the problem I discovered a way to exploit the situation. I just didnt go to toilet...and my game was worse and worse. MAN....what a frustration!!!! I used the situation to practice my emotions. After every missed ball I tried to stay calm and composed. Well...I endured for whole hour...what a torture... /ccboard/images/icons/smile.gif But I really think that it helped me a lot as I had the time to realize that I am NOT perfect!!! Well I know I am not perfect but my subconsciousness seems not to know it! /ccboard/images/icons/smile.gif I will see the result next time I make mistake...
Wish me good luck! /ccboard/images/icons/smile.gif

08-20-2002, 02:39 AM
Mad is bad /ccboard/images/icons/wink.gif

08-20-2002, 07:17 AM
I saw marek and went "Wow, long time since I've seen that name!" Good to see you back, and congrats on the come back. Those are true testers for sure...sid

08-20-2002, 07:33 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote: ObeOne:</font><hr> Mad is bad /ccboard/images/icons/wink.gif <hr></blockquote>

lol. sometimes i get mad and then find out the thing i thought i was angry at was not the real thing i was angry at.i wish i could figure this out quick but sometimes it takes me a long time./ccboard/images/icons/frown.gif


08-20-2002, 07:47 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote: marek:</font><hr> Well....I am not perfect.....thats the thing i need to say to myself all the time...

marek, you got the right idea. 'progress not perfection'

i have a long way to go with my pool game.if i was beating myself for what i cannot do yet, i would be so tense i couldnt even do what i can do. to me, winning or losing in apa doesnt matter. the way it does help is with my focus.it tests my ability to screen out everything going on outside the table and tests my ability to cut shots in the middle of the green without distracted by the green.
that is my biggest challenge right now.

in the final analysis, if i am seeing improvement and mastering new skills in practice, that matters the most to me. plus i have no control over what level of player the captain puts me up aginst in apa and whether that allows me to advance to higher ranks or not.the important thing is knowing that i am getting better and have a zeal for playing my best pool


08-20-2002, 08:14 AM

Chris Cass
08-20-2002, 08:37 AM
Hi Marek,

Glad to see ya stop by. I know how frustrating matches can get with the intensity of the final rounds draws near. Getting angry as you and I both know doesn't do anything but cloud our minds. One can only truely focus on the task at hand. If it's anger? Than, that's what your focusing on. As you said, you have to let it go quickly or it will consume you and forget making balls. It might work on the break but that's it. LOL

I like you too, have needed to visit the Water Closet too while in a match. The balls aren't going anywhere and the game can wait. That's also where you need to go to relieve this match tension. Do some soul searching and just calm down. Your best pool comes from a calm and happy mind.

My advice to you big guy is. When you get these back to back matches. Ask the TD for a short break to use the WC. He can't denie you that and most will say, ok. Even off a win you should take a trip to the WC for the same reasons. Keep you focusing in check. Stay calm and return with new vigor.

If you egnore the signals that your body sending or just put them off. You'll tend to lose part of your focus to keeping these feelings on pause. This is why they allow a 5 min break during a match. 100% focus means just that. If your at 80% and 20% on what's you kidneys doing, that's not good. LOL

I'm really happy for you. Coming back makes a champion. What also makes a champion is knowing what it takes to stay clear, focused and in touch with your feelings. This includes your kidneys. LOL By the way. I've spent most of my life in the loser bracket. When, I get knocked into it I say to myself. Oh well, here we go again. hahahahahaha I do play some of my best pool under extreme pressure. I know this is sick but I kind of like the loser bracket. LOL

Best regards,

C.C.~~Mareks over seas coach.....

9 Ball Girl
08-20-2002, 08:47 AM
Hey Marek, if people were perfect, they wouldn't have invented erasers on pencils. Whoa, that was deep.

Anyways, go to the WC ! The last thing you need to have on your mind is to think about how much longer you can hold it instead of thinking about where the CB is going to stop for your next shot. And don't forget to wash your hands. /ccboard/images/icons/smile.gif No, really. I go to the WC after every match, even if I don't have to go, I go just to wash my hands. I like to start a new match with a new person with clean hands and not with chalk that's been left over from my last match. It's a thing I have, I guess.

Most important, let your cue do the talking .

08-20-2002, 08:55 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote: whitewolf:</font><hr> &lt;blockquote&gt;&lt;font class="small"&gt;Quote: ObeOne:&lt;/font&gt;&lt;hr&gt; Mad is bad /ccboard/images/icons/wink.gif &lt;hr&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;

You must be a jeteye knight /ccboard/images/icons/smile.gif <hr></blockquote>
&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;Whitewolf, there is an interesting Japanese story/myth about a Samurai that looks for another Samurai who killed his overlord. For three years he searches for this Samurai to avenge his overlord. He finds him sitting in a Geisha house. He draws his sword and confronts him, but the Samurai (not to be intimidated) quickly stands and spits in his face. They stare eye to eye for about 15 seconds, then the first Samurai sheaths his sword and walks away. He reasoned that killing him now would be out of anger, and not to avenge his overlord. Personally, I would kill him because now I have two reasons to do so. But, to each his own. JMHO ***Lester***

08-20-2002, 11:39 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote: marek:</font><hr> I realized that I must leave my anger behind as fast as possible. my mind clouded by storm of anger. if the anger finds somehow a way into your mind you CAN and you MUST get rid of it as fast as possible.<hr></blockquote>If you feel the anger, let the anger flow, and strike out at your opponent: you will cross over to the dark side.

08-20-2002, 12:37 PM
The pilot cannot mitigate the billows or calm the winds. You earned your wings today merek! St

08-21-2002, 01:07 PM
Hi Marek,
I found this story and thought you might enjoy it.

An old Indian Grandfather said to his grandson who came to him with anger at a friend who had done him an injustice...

"Let me tell you a story. I too...at times...have felt a great hate for those that have taken so much...with no sorrow for what they do. But hate wears you down...and does not hurt your enemy. It is like a poison and wishing your enemy would die. I have struggled with these feelings many times."

He continued....

"It is as if there are two wolves inside me;
One is good and does no harm. He lives in harmony with all around him and does not take offense when no offense was intended. He will only fight when it is right to do so...and the right way. He saves all his energy for the right fight.

But the other wolf...ahhhh !!!

He is full of anger. The littlest thing will set him into a fit of temper. He fights everyone...all the time...for no reason. He cannot think because his anger and hate are so great. It's helpless anger...for his anger will change nothing. Sometimes it is hard to live with these two wolves inside me...for both of them try to dominate my spirit."

The boy looked intently into his Grandfather's eyes and asked... "Which one wins...Grandfather?"

The Grandfather smiled and quietly said....

"The one I feed."

08-21-2002, 02:09 PM
I like that story travellerdl2, sometimes we do tend to feed the wrong wolf. I just started to this thread and your post come up first. Rather than going through the whole thread I'll stop here. I think a little anger is ok, but prefer to use the word frustration. I channel that to the positive sense and just direct it towards determination. Related to pool I just become agressive with focus and know better when to back off or duck during a game. It's our own fault we got ourselves in the situation and no one else is to blame. Sometimes we lose and we just have to accept that fact. If nothing else I take something positive from the match/game, in this case, and use it in the future. I don't like feeding the other wolf, I hope he mentally starves. He still is alive though and always will be.

08-21-2002, 02:38 PM

08-21-2002, 03:46 PM
Our 92% whitewolf dog Sam was eternally hungry. At 120 to 130 lbs, our other dog at 50 lbs dared not get in his way if there was a race for food.

Where is it you live? Well never mind I don't want to be his next piece of meat. LOL Wolfing it down makes sense.

08-22-2002, 07:03 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote: Rod:</font><hr> Our 92% whitewolf dog Sam was eternally hungry. At 120 to 130 lbs, our other dog at 50 lbs dared not get in his way if there was a race for food.

Where is it you live? Well never mind I don't want to be his next piece of meat. LOL Wolfing it down makes sense. <hr></blockquote>

states and localities vary in their rules on wolf dogs.some go by percent, some charge a bunch of money and some are illegal. some people call their wolf dog mal mix or hsky mix depending on the dogs appearance, to protect the dogs.it seems like the western states are more liberal as to wolfdog ownership.


08-22-2002, 07:06 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote: Rod:</font><hr> Our 92% whitewolf dog Sam was eternally hungry. At 120 to 130 lbs, our other dog at 50 lbs dared not get in his way if there was a race for food.

Where is it you live? Well never mind I don't want to be his next piece of meat. LOL Wolfing it down makes sense. <hr></blockquote>

haha. sam never bit anyone. one time he ran up to say hi to a lady with a small dog. she smacked him on the nose, and he just turned and walked the other way.


9 Ball Girl
08-22-2002, 07:09 AM
Awww, poor Sam. I love dogs. I used to have a yellow labrador retriever, Buddy. He was the best! I'm not a fan of little dogs though I love all dogs.

08-22-2002, 03:39 PM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote: 9 Ball Girl:</font><hr> Awww, poor Sam. I love dogs. I used to have a yellow labrador retriever, Buddy. He was the best! I'm not a fan of little dogs though I love all dogs. <hr></blockquote>

yes he was a sweetie and my soul mate. now i have rocky 8yo alaskan malamute and jasper 6yo mix and paris, siberian husky puppy 6mo. paris completed our pack. i wanted a young one so they wouldnt all get sick and die at the same time.

paris the puppy is the one that is sick. she has a bleeding disorder and will need treatments etc. vets are very expensive,especially when they have to go to the vet specialist hospital for their treatment.not that i am complaining.she is a sweetheart and worth much more than her weight in gold.you can see her on rockys website.

we spent 5000 trying to save sams life. i am just so glad she doesnt have cancer.

i guess it is pretty obvious that my dogs are my children and i speak their language. i am a fanatic. there is nothing i would not do for them.