View Full Version : Grocery shopping in the left's dystopian future.

08-13-2011, 11:55 AM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Did you ever wonder what it will be like to shop in a supermarket in the year 2020? How this experience will change if the Nanny State goes completely out of control? Following is my rendition of a typical scene at the cash register.

The customer pushed his wagon through the checkout line, placed his foodstuffs on the conveyor, and reached the point where he encountered the young lady who will be his cashier. Her face and neck were covered in tattoos having a dragon or vampire motif, and there was more metal lodged in her head than in the engine of a ’56 Chevy. She gazed at the customer with a bored and vacant expression. After scanning the items, she announced the amount due. The customer pulled his trusty VISA card from his wallet.

“You can’t use credit or debit cards anymore,” announced the gatekeeper.

“Oh, that’s right,” mumbled the customer, returning the card to his wallet and removing another. “I forgot that we switched over to the Sustainable Resource and Healthy Body card.”

As the cashier looked on with an air of impatience, the customer slid his Sustainable Resource and Healthy Body card through the reader. A large red light on the computer terminal began flashing.

“Not again,” groaned the decorated young lady. “This is the third one today.” She focused her attention on the report coming up on her monitor.

“What’s wrong?” he inquired.

“Oh, c’mon, don’t act innocent. You already used up all your monthly calorie and fat points, in every food group.”

“Did I?”

This last remark was greeted with a pout, the intensity of which was accentuated by the dark ink that graced the folds of her facial skin. “Never mind the food groups. The entire month’s animal protein allowance was used up in half a month. What happened? Did you go on an eating binge every day?”

“No … well … actually, I’ve been on the same diet for at least twenty years. As you can see, I’m fit as a fiddle.”

“And what about this,” she declared, pointing a ring-laden finger at the computer screen. “You’re trying to buy a pound of coffee that’s not Fair Trade. Do you have a special exemption?”

“I did, but I lost it,” he responded, shrugging his shoulders.

“Yeah, right. I don’t suppose you have any leftover carbon credits? You can use them to offset non-Fair Trade purchases.”
“I’ve never owned a carbon credit,” said the man, with a sigh. “It almost happened when I installed one of those solar panels in the moonroof of my car, but it made my head so hot in the summer that I had to get rid of it.”

“That was dumb. And how come you haven’t bought a single ethnic dish, not even a Category 2 or 3?”

“I eat very bland food.”

“Yeah, and I’m Barack Obama. Oh, look—I don’t believe it,” she cried, her eyes again fixed on the computer screen, “you have refused, every time you use the Sustainable Resource and Healthy Body card, to make a single donation to an approved charity. Not even last week’s national campaign for pre-teen transgendered emotional trauma victims!”

“I donate to charity privately.”

The young lady picked up the phone, and dialed the extension for house security … </div></div>

<span style='font-family: Comic Sans MS'><span style='font-size: 23pt'>LONG LIVE THE PROGRESSIVE REVOLUTION! (http://awolcivilization.com/?p=2034#more-2034)</span></span>