View Full Version : Santa Baby, Bring Me Coal

12-12-2011, 10:02 AM
It's time for a reality check from all of the usual liberal nutjob circle-jerking going on over here.

Dedicated to my long-time friend from WV.


Katie Kieffer
Dec 12, 2011

I want a coal plant for Christmas, and not because I’m a naughty girl. I want lots of coal so I can power up the high-tech toys Santa is bringing me, including an electronic robot maid that cooks and cleans, a 32-meter-wide TV and a modern, coal-fired steam locomotive that allows me to bypass the TSA Grope Squad when I travel cross-country.

OK, so Santa probably won’t be sending a full-size, coal-fired train down my chimney. But, like many of you, I may be getting small electronics of Christmas (or Hanukkah). As millions of us ring in the New Year by adding new gadgets to the power grid, we need to make sure we have ample electricity to fire up our cutting-edge iPads, TVs, sound systems and smartphones.
Americans get almost half of their electricity from coal. I think coal is a wonderful source of energy and we need to continue producing it.

Politically-motivated environmentalists like President Obama maintain that we can wean ourselves from coal and oil and rely on natural gas and sustainable energy. TIME Magazine reports: ‘If all goes well, gas should help displace coal. … In a speech on March 30, President Barack Obama hailed natural gas as part of the solution to reducing America’s oil addiction. “The potential for natural gas is enormous.”’

President Obama’s plan is hypocritical because his administration is actively threatening natural gas fracking and he has shackled clean tech development through excessive government intervention.

Natural gas augments but does not replace our need for coal; TIME reports that natural gas only supplies about 25 percent of U.S. electricity and only provides heat for about 60 million U.S. homes. Trucks, planes and trains run on petroleum. Plus, sustainable technologies like wind and solar are still neither profitable nor efficient.

The EPA, environmental activists like Michael Bloomberg and the Sierra Club’s “Beyond Coal” campaign are fighting hard for new regulations that will quickly force the coal industry out of business.

In July, citing the Clean Air Act and “public health benefits,” the EPA issued rules that require coal plants to dramatically reduce their cross-state emissions. As a result, American Electric Power has plans to shed hundreds of jobs, shut down coal plants and lose billions of dollars in order to execute the cross-border mandates within the EPA’s three-year compliance time limit.

This month, the EPA is expected to announce a set of new smog regulations that will clamp down on power companies. “Not so fast,” cautions the North American Electric Reliability Corporation (NAERC)—a panel of volunteer industry experts that the government designates to ensure and improve reliability in the electric power grid.

NAERC warns that the EPA’s strict regulations will cause up to 600 large power plants across the country to shut down for months while they adopt the new rules and will force numerous older plants to shut down indefinitely because they won’t be able to afford compliance. The result will be power blackouts across the country plus additional power grid instability in drought-prone areas like Texas due to new EPA cooling water rules.

So, the government’s own designated industry experts are warning us that the EPA’s smog rules will have big costs: Soaring energy prices, frequent blackouts and job loss. And the EPA can hardly cite the “public health dangers” of greenhouse gases with a straight face when internal government probes reveal that the EPA has altered, withheld and distorted its scientific findings in order to sell the notion that greenhouse gas emissions harm humans.

What’s the EPA’s replacement plan for coal? You can’t just shut down a primary source of American energy without proposing a cleaner, more efficient and more affordable alternative. Clean technology is not yet a viable replacement because government intervention has stymied clean tech development, yielding flaming electric cars (think the Chevy Volt), bankrupt solar panel companies (think Solyndra) and windmills that kill birds without supplying affordable energy to humans (think President Obama’s Cape Wind Project).

The wealthier a country becomes, the cleaner it becomes. This month, the Global Carbon Project released a study showing that developing countries like India and China account for the majority (57 percent) of global greenhouse emissions.

Only rich economies can afford to develop the latest clean technology. Before we can afford the costs associated with developing the supposedly cleaner technology behind solar and wind, we need to revive our rapidly deteriorating economy. And by “revive,” I mean continue developing fuels like coal that will prevent power blackouts, create jobs and lower the cost of energy. Minimal smog is a small price to pay for a safe and reliable power grid and a healthy, growing economy.

Santa baby, there's one thing I really do need, the deed, to a coal mine, Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight.

Katie Kieffer is a conservative multimedia personality, writer and public speaker who runs KatieKieffer.com.

12-12-2011, 01:06 PM
I was curious who this woman might be?

Well, beyond the conservative multi-media personality she says she is, I mean. There's a little biographical area linked, and it turns out she has the highest of academic and scientific credentials-- 6 years experience in real estate! Can't get a lot more qualified on national energy or coal matters than that!

Also turns out that there is an ARCHIVE of previous pieces she's written, I presume all for TownHall, but that might not be quite correct. Here's a partial and edited listing:

Santa Baby, Bring Me Coal (the piece cited here)
By Katie Kieffer (Dec 12, 2011)

I want a coal plant for Christmas, and not because I’m a naughty girl. I want lots of coal so I can power up the high-tech toys Santa is bringing me, including an electronic... more

Frack, Baby, Frack
By Katie Kieffer (Dec 05, 2011)

I have a slam-dunk plan for creating jobs: Frack baby, frack. Move like Shaq. Let’s beat the buzzer, Shaq-style, and score points for the U.S. economy. Frack... more

Dump the EPA
By Katie Kieffer (Nov 28, 2011)

Like a bad lover, the EPA is a nagging, beguiling mooch. The EPA unconstitutionally barged into our lives and we need to break free from this destructive relationship; let’s... more

Piping Up Oil Jobs
By Katie Kieffer (Nov 21, 2011)

Like a good neighbor, Canada is there—offering America tens of thousands of jobs, protection against soaring gas prices and up to 700,000 barrels of crude oil a day for... more

Follow the Playboy
By Katie Kieffer (Nov 14, 2011)

As children, we play “Follow the Leader.” As adults, we occasionally play “Follow the Playboy” because history shows us that imperfect men can lead. Many pioneers in their... more

Sex Sells Socialism
By Katie Kieffer (Oct 24, 2011)

When all else fails, sex sells. The only way to sell the American public on socialism is to use sex appeal because socialism does not appeal to reason or justice. And... more

Why Capitalism Glorifies God
By Katie Kieffer (Oct 17, 2011)

I contend that if you profess to believe in God, you must also embrace capitalism. Lately, many religious shepherds are abandoning reason in favor of sentiment. Catholic... more

Selfish Disobedience
By Katie Kieffer (Oct 10, 2011)

When a majority of progressive slugs call for thievery, I believe that a minority of “selfish” job creators may exercise Thoreau-style civil disobedience. The Occupy Wall... more

Bringing Selfish Back
By Katie Kieffer (Oct 03, 2011)

When politicians, journalists and college professors use words like “share,” “fair” and “redistribution,” they are trying to make socialist ideas sound sexy. Socialism isn’t... more

Capitalism's Biggest Users
By Katie Kieffer (Sep 26, 2011)

What do Google Chairman Eric Schmidt, business tycoon Warren Buffett, Dallas Mavericks billionaire owner Mark Cuban, and movie star Brad Pitt have in common? Each man is a... more

Earn Black Belt Unemployment
By Katie Kieffer (Sep 19, 2011)

“Take a look at this black belt I’m wearing people. You think anyone wants a roundhouse kick to the face while I'm wearin’ this bad boy?” It’s time for unemployed... more

Free Entrepreneurs Are Like Wet Fish
By Katie Kieffer (Aug 22, 2011)

If we are serious about creating jobs, then we should treat entrepreneurs like fish. Just as fish need a certain environment to live, entrepreneurs require a unique... more

I Like Big Trucks And I Cannot Lie
By Katie Kieffer (Aug 15, 2011)

So, fellas! So, ladies! Do you want cheap gas and big, safe rides? Then, drill. Drill. Drill a healthy life. No, I’m not Sir Mix-A-Lot. I simply think we should... more

Why I Hope the Rich Get Richer
By Katie Kieffer (Aug 01, 2011)

Insecure business moguls like Warren Buffet occasionally spout anti-affluence nonsense like the rich “…should be paying a lot more in taxes.” If Buffet won’t defend the rich,... more

Rupert Murdoch Plays Fair
By Katie Kieffer (Jul 25, 2011)

When arch rivals like the Chicago Bears and the Green Bay Packers go head-to-head, anything is fair game. Except cheating. Winning is the end-goal, but neither team will... more

Skyscraper "Loophole" Creates Jobs
By Katie Kieffer (Jul 18, 2011)

When Michael Moore looks at a skyscraper, he sees a bloated monument to rich investors. He becomes nauseous and his lunch floats back up into his throat as he imagines the... more

Media Gossip Cheats Men and Capitalism
By Katie Kieffer (Jun 06, 2011)

Lately, the media has been wetting the public’s appetite for gossip, handing out cupcake stories like Weinergate, Arnold’s affair, John Edwards’ alleged criminal infidelity... more

Ending High Gas Prices
By Katie Kieffer (May 23, 2011)

I’m picking out bananas at the grocery store when a young woman slides up beside me and starts adding fruit to her cart while she carries on a loud cell phone conversation... more

Love Oil And It Loves You Back
By Katie Kieffer (Apr 04, 2011)

Listening to morning shows is a good way to wind up in a psychiatrist’s office. I flip between 300 channels and have three basic choices: Bad economic news,... more

FDA Headbangs With Condoms, Not Cigs
By Katie Kieffer (Mar 28, 2011)

If young people have casual sex, they’re rock stars, as long as they use condoms. If they casually smoke cigarettes, they’re borderline criminals. According to the FDA, that... more

12-12-2011, 02:31 PM
I 'd like to see her spread, :p she kinda hot.

12-12-2011, 03:03 PM
KK iz sickeningly stupid.

12-12-2011, 06:05 PM
Wow, you really showed her.

12-12-2011, 07:31 PM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: nAz</div><div class="ubbcode-body">

I 'd like to see her spread, :p she kinda hot.


Agreed! I'd like to frack her.

12-13-2011, 04:48 AM
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: hondo</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: nAz</div><div class="ubbcode-body">

I 'd like to see her spread, :p she kinda hot.


Agreed! I'd like to frack her. </div></div>
A teacher has his say!
The truth will set you free.