View Full Version : "The Fugitive"

03-17-2002, 10:30 AM
It was a dark, cloudy night in Dallas. The clouds hung low and the moisture in the air created an eerie fog over the outlying areas of town.

The phone rang at the local police station. The operator answered; "Dallas PD 911. What's your emergency?" The female voice on the other end of the line was hysterical..."He's gone!" she shouted..."I woke up in the middle of the night...the door was open and he was gone!" The 911 operator replied "Calm down Miss. We'll get an officer out there right away."

The officer arrived and found a very distraught woman standing in the front yard, looking endlessly into the dark night, as if to search for the man who had "vanished."

The investigation revealed no apparent sign of struggle and the only items missing from the home were the "victim's" pool cues and a few items of clothing.

The officer asked the distraught young woman if there had been "an argument or something." Her response would have frightened even the most seasoned police officer; "Of course not! We were getting married tomorrow! We love each other!" "Calm down ma'am. These questions have to be asked. Excuse me a moment" the officer said as he walked toward Detective O'Connor, the department's top missing persons investigator.

"The lady says they were to be married tomorrow. She says they didn't argue. I don't know what to think" replied the street cop.

"It's obvious rookie. I've seen this a hundred times before. It's going to have tragic results, I'm afraid."

The officer asked O'Connor "What? Kidnapped by another woman? A jealous admirer that felt betrayed by his love for another?

"Much worse. Much, much worse. We'll probably NEVER find him. It's a tragic example of what happens when you mix a pool player with a woman...a woman that interferes with his game...it ends in a horrible finale."

"What is it?" begged the rookie patrolman.

"Cold feet son. Cold feet. The boy's got ice-cold feet. Put out an all points bulletin to every pool hall, tavern, bar, truck stop and back alley gambling hall..."

"We've got ourselves a wedding fugitive."

Fellow CCB'ers...the wedding is a mere 3 hours away and my stomach is rumbling like I just drew Strickland in a pool match. Wish me luck. I'm about to crap my pants.


Ken (single for exactly 210 more minutes)

03-17-2002, 10:39 AM
Strickland's only going to spank you for the set, the new wife will ALWAYS be there when you open the door after a night prowling in the the green felt jungle. It's your choice to kick it up with Earl again,,,not quite the same with you after today...sid~~~would have to find a really special woman understanding up front the "way it is" with my hobby..."There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."

03-17-2002, 10:50 AM
If the lights in the church dim just before the preach is to say the I DO'S run like hell and leave everything behind. We'll loan you a stick /ccboard/images/icons/smile.gif

03-17-2002, 10:54 AM
Best of luck my friend. It took me four tries to find the right woman. My approach to women is the same as my approach to pool. "Never give up." LOL

03-17-2002, 11:42 AM
Just some advice from a fellow married guy: Let her know up front how important pool is to you. This includes letting her know your pool schedule (practice hours & events). You'll by-pass these mistakes from so many of us guys.

Congrats & Good Luck!

The Cuemage

03-17-2002, 11:48 AM
Congrats Ken.. hope this is the best match of your life...

03-17-2002, 12:39 PM
You just watch and see cheezemister, something like that'll(diming lights) likely happen! Weddings are ominous in that way...sid

03-17-2002, 09:36 PM
It's okay...everything is going to be alright...I made it through the vows without passing out (even though I kept waiting for the lights to dim for my escape!)

I think we have a greater understanding of how much pool means to me as a sport, hobby, passion or however you want to put it. We had a "talk" on the way to the nuptials and everything as far as my game and practice goes looks good.

After the wedding, the reception was at her sister's place (a rather glitzy home in a neighborhood full of the "beautiful people", including Jose Canseco's old house) and guess what was upstairs? That's right...an 8' Olhausen!

I took the new In-Laws to school in a game of 8-ball, drank a few beers, ate some cake and now I'm at home, preparing for work tomorrow. Yes, the "Honeymoon" won't be until June (too much work to be done.)

But all is not lost...Ken's getting ready for bed AND the opportunity to show his new bride a version of "one pocket!"

Sorry...you should know me by now...I just couldn't resist!

Goodnight Y'all (that's TEXAS talk)

(Sid...let me know when you are going to be at Click's/Stillman and I will meet you.)

Thanks to all for the "well wishes" and advice.

Ken (sentenced for life!)

03-17-2002, 09:48 PM
Put me in your place right now and I would be far away from any damn computer keyboards or thinking about meeting up with a dog of a pool player like me...time to consumate Ken. "When a woman's gots-ta-go, a woman's gots-ta-go." You got your "husbandly duties" man,,,,get busy...sid~~~remembers what those first bonding moments was like w-a-a-a-y back them, enjoy and be happy

03-17-2002, 10:10 PM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote: rackmup:</font><hr> Goodnight Y'all (that's TEXAS talk)

(Sid...let me know when you are going to be at Click's/Stillman and I will meet you.)

Ken (sentenced for life!) <hr></blockquote>

Hi Ken,

Congratulations! Give the future ex-#3 my regards! (Hey, your words, not mine!)

Glad you can spell "y'all"! A lot of people don't spell it correctly, and end up with something like "ya'll"!

Really, congratulations. This is the one!

Chris Cass
03-17-2002, 10:41 PM
Well Ken,
You'll have to let us know who got knocked out first in the 1 pocket game. LOL I'm very happy for you Ken. I wish you the best. Did I tell you I took my wife to an open 9 ball event on our honeymoon?

Met Richard Black and BS'd with Jim McDermott for an hr. Talked to Jim Willard for a couple of hrs. Talked to Ewa Mataya Lawrence for a while Floyd was stinking up the table in a match in which the underdog blew some easy shots.LOL

You have my best,
C.C.~~she's ok with Ken playing, ya right. lets see who wins....LOLLOLLOL

Ralph S.
03-17-2002, 10:59 PM
Congratulations Ken....And best of luck to you and your bride.
Ralph S.&gt;just lost my best friend and pool playing buddy to the marriage thing a few months ago.

03-17-2002, 11:30 PM
Ken, congratulations to you and your bride, Laura? We now know where the "family get togethers" will take place!
Have fun and remember good technique is important at one pocket too!!!

03-18-2002, 07:06 AM
The first round was thriller with the action lasting nearly an hour before "The Fugitive's" opponent forfeited the match due to fatigue.

The second round, a race-to-three format, began a little over an hour later and was a battle to hill/hill. Both competitors decided to let the match end in a tie as the wee hours of the morning were drawing near. They agreed to resume play either at lunch time today or later this evening.

These match results are available only at <font color=purple>BILLIARDSDIGEST.COM</font color=purple> and cannot be found anywhere else on the net!


Ken (almost broke his "cue" during round two and has an awful cramp in his thigh...don't ask.)

Gayle in MD
03-18-2002, 07:11 AM
Dear Ken,
My very best wishes to you and your bride, and I hope this will be the best match of your life. If you apply the same principles to your relationship as you would a fine cue and pool table, I'm sure all will be well. Be a "Striaght shooter" remember to always gently "stroke" before you shoot. For a lifetime of service, remember that daily maintainence is required. Stay Level, and keep both feet firmly planted on the floor. Warping is a risk when left too long in the car. Take time to walk around and survey the whole situation before you act. And No Jiffy, only Peter Pan smooth will do!
Gayle in MD.

03-18-2002, 10:26 AM
The things I learn on this board. Thank god for y'all (my aunt says "yuns", Pennsylvania talk). Gayle, that's just the type of info I need.


03-18-2002, 10:38 AM
Playing a little "position", I'll bet.


<blockquote><font class="small">Quote: rackmup:</font><hr>

Ken (almost broke his "cue" during round two and has an awful cramp in his thigh...don't ask.) <hr></blockquote>