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View Full Version : "Loss Hangovers" $$$



Sid_Vicious
06-01-2003, 01:06 PM
Let me state right now that I'm not asking how I should recognize a time to quit and cut my losses, please remember this as you read this. Secondly I want to add that I'm not looking for a preaching like "If you're playing for more than you can afford and it bothers you, then don't gamble that much", advice.

I was wondering how you players who will "put something on the game" every once in a while, recover from the blues you get or maybe used to get following a losing day. I don't bet the farm, but there are days and there are opponents who happen along whom I enjoy gambling with and as always some days end moderately deeper in personal cash lost, and I'm seeking feedback from y'all who have surely awaken the morning after and had to handle the downer feelings. All I want is advice or philosophies for getting desensitized to the guilt. Things like "well it's only money" or "well I won their cash last time" are examples, and yet those are sounding like a broken record these days to me.

How do you deal with your guilty inner thoughts "the day after"???sid

Nightstalker
06-01-2003, 01:18 PM
Guilt? What guilt? LOL /ccboard/images/graemlins/cool.gif

06-01-2003, 01:25 PM
Well Sid, all I can say is, if you're playing for more than you can afford and it bothers you, then don't gamble that mu... er, oops, sorry. Nevermind. /ccboard/images/graemlins/laugh.gif /ccboard/images/graemlins/tongue.gif

Seriously, I don't know what to tell you. Other than what you don't want to hear... /ccboard/images/graemlins/wink.gif

Sid_Vicious
06-01-2003, 01:44 PM
I've basically conquered the day-after loss feelings, but it seemed to be something everyone who does, or ever will gamble with their own money, will go through many times. JMA2C...sid

Popcorn
06-01-2003, 01:54 PM
You need to know why you were gambling in the first place. Was it an attempt to make some money, an ego thing and you did not want to back down from a challenge, or you enjoy the thrill of playing under the pressure and the attention you get in the pool room (i.e., it attracts a crowd and for a short time you are the center of attention), I could go on. If you feel this bad after losing, you may have been playing for the wrong reason or should not have been gambling at all. You can't view gambling on a day to day basis. It is a long term endeavor just like a business. Don't live and die with each match, you will go nuts. If there is something to be learned from it, fine, beyond that forget it. It sounds like you feel worse about the losing, then the money, maybe you made a bad game and now feel like a sucker, or you played so bad you feel like a dog, or just didn't quit when you knew you should have. Either way, learn from it, then forget about it. If it is the money you are so upset about, you know the answer to that, don't be gambling.
In answer to your actual question, just take a reality check, it is not life and death.

nAz
06-01-2003, 02:01 PM
hmm good post.

I usually just go back the next day and try to beat the person that got me or someone else for cash.

remember dude you can not win all the time the $$ goes around and around next time, it'll be you sleeping soundly the night you win the cash.

what really bothers me when i lose the $ is when i lose becuase i played so bad or missed a shot on an easy out. things like that drive me batty, thats when i start to replay what i did wrong the next day and i feel shitty.


Naz~~Im depressed now

Candyman
06-01-2003, 02:09 PM
A friend of mine gambles a lot. I have seen him win big and lose big. One day after he had dropped a bundle on the Super Bowl, I had a conversation with him about how he could have such a good attitude after losing so much. This is how it went: " Virgin, how can you drop 10 big ones and be here buying rounds and acting like nothing has happened?" "Well Lock, nothing has happened to me. I haven't lost anything. The boot lost that money! I keep an old rubber boot in the closet and that is where I keep my gambling money. Whether I win or lose, the money goes in the boot." He explained to me that mentally you have to separate yourself from gambling money or it will drive you crazy. I think he had the right idea. Lock

dg-in-centralpa
06-01-2003, 03:21 PM
I agree with Candyman - I play poker once a month with the guys. Lately I've been on a winning streak. I'm up $20 - $60 each time playing nickel/dime/quarter. When I come home from work all my change goes into a jar. That becomes my poker money. All my winnings go there and my losings come from there. It's not like I was counting on that money for bills or groceries. If I lose $20 that's the cost of going to the movies. Plus I will generally will eat and drink more than my losings. Hope this will help.

DG - who's still pissed at Yoko

Qtec
06-01-2003, 03:53 PM
Would you call yourself a pool player or a gambler.? Q /ccboard/images/graemlins/smirk.gif

cycopath
06-01-2003, 04:26 PM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote dg-in-centralpa:</font><hr> I agree with Candyman - I play poker once a month with the guys...When I come home from work all my change goes into a jar. That becomes my poker money. All my winnings go there and my losings come from there. <hr /></blockquote>My wife's father does the same thing for his weekly poker night. He has a money bag that he carries there and back every Monday night. All the betting money goes in and out of that bag, and that's the only time it's opened. Works for him. I'll have to ask him what happens if/when the bag goes empty one day. Maybe he'll give "the bag" a loan. /ccboard/images/graemlins/wink.gif

SpiderMan
06-01-2003, 06:17 PM
Sid,

Just got off the 'phone with Santa Claus. He said that he was playing very well yesterday when you guys met at Skillman. How about you, were you off or tired? I wouldn't have thought yesterday's results would be typical, though I do allow that he's playing better than the first time you matched up.

You may have to find a reason to switch games on him.

SpiderMan

Rod
06-01-2003, 07:45 PM
Hi Sid,
The title makes me think a loss and a hangover. If I had a hangover it would be about alcohol and not a loss. That would make me more upset than anything. If I got down on myself when I lost then I'd never bet another dime. I have to accept the fact that you win some and lose some. Things don't always work out as we expect. If you played bad, then you played bad. If you played well and still lost then maybe your not making the right game. Sometimes we play better than expected and sometimes worst. I base mine on how I play over all. I don't let my mind get expanded on a real good day and carry that forwards. Nor do I carry the feelings of a poor day. One way your over inflated or your extremely down. I take the upper middle path, I need my sanity.

Rod

Sid_Vicious
06-02-2003, 09:28 AM
Santa wasn't playing particularly well, I was off, plus as you know 8-ball isn't my favorite game. Still I'd say that I had enough fun hittin' balls around with the guy to not sweat any bullets about losing a couple of sets, besides he and I have a set in-progress for the next time he and I get together, I have him down 4 games to 0, going to seven. The place shut us down around 3am, and then stiffed me with a $77 tab! We probably needed to split some of the table time, but since I joined him on HIS table, and he was the one to turn in the balls but charged no time, I assume they stacked my CC. I now have a new attitude about certain management behind the bar, about running a tab and about making myself so familiar around there. In short, I'm bound to be spreading myself around to another PH or two. I'd think a regular would not be screwed that way,,,and before you suggest it, "I did not consume THAT much to drink." sid

Sid_Vicious
06-02-2003, 09:54 AM
No the hangover word was used as a witty adj to describe the entire morning after feeling of playing from 1PM to 230AM and throwing more money into the hole than pulling out, all in all beat physically and weary.

I didn't really have any real ill feelings about any of the events of losses, just didn't play well but did have fun. Times in the past I've lost less and it bothered me more, so I am not as sensitive about it as I once was, so progress is being made. I just figured there were more cash players here with lots more experience, and there would be some individual philosophies about the emotions of losing cash and how they "let it go" without after effects of personal self worth damage. I used to do that, and I would expect most everyone has who has ever wagered a little deeper into their wallets than they should have.

I played an older gent last Saturday for 5, a cheap set of 9-ball but the guy literally HATES to lose money, so cheap is the way we have played the last few times. I took his five 5-3, he grumbled that he just didn't gamble well and quit on me. It really bothers some people A LOT to lose even pinnace like 5 bucks....sid

SpiderMan
06-02-2003, 10:10 AM
Santa thought he was playing better than normal, at least while he was really focused. He said that he got distracted by Sterling later in the night.

$77 is a ridiculous tab if you weren't swilling the beer!!!!! I still think Click's pushes a corporate philosophy to pad tabs ... don't forget our buddy Quenton's experiment, and what happened to Chopstick and I in Memphis.

You need to start hanging out at our Monday-night spot. Free pool all day and night, plus I think you'll really like the new bartender.

SpiderMan

Rich R.
06-02-2003, 10:21 AM
Sid, I know this may sound preachy, but it really is not meant that way. Although I have not gambled in a long time, this was really my attitude, when I did gamble.

I never gambled for more money than I could afford to lose.
When I lost, I looked at it the same as paying for any other product or service. When I won, I condisered it found money, just as picking up a quarter on the sidewalk.

I always tried to remove the money aspect from the game and the person I was playing.
In fact, I really enjoyed removing the money from the person I was playing. /ccboard/images/graemlins/blush.gif /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

Deeman
06-02-2003, 10:22 AM
Spiderman,

O.K. Let me know what happened to you and Chopstick in Memphis. Any place I would know?

Dee

SPetty
06-02-2003, 11:27 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote Sid_Vicious:</font><hr> ...plus as you know 8-ball isn't my favorite game.
...and then stiffed me with a $77 tab!
...table time
...I'm bound to be spreading myself around to another PH or two.<hr /></blockquote>Howdy Sid,

Well spread yourself out to PettyPoint Pool Hall - I need some 9-ball talent. I won't stiff you with the tab or charge you table time, and it's BYOB so it's economically reasonable!

The swimming pool's open, the guest room is carpeted, the grill is set up...

Let me know!

SPetty
06-02-2003, 11:29 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote SpiderMan:</font><hr> You need to start hanging out at our Monday-night spot. Free pool all day and night, plus I think you'll really like the new bartender.<hr /></blockquote>Howdy Spiderman,

Where is your Monday-night spot? (You've got so many...)

Don't forget another choice for you guys is PettyPoint Pool Hall (see prior post...) /ccboard/images/graemlins/smile.gif

(My nephew was here for Memorial Day and he suggests PettyPoint Pleasure Palace as a more appropriate name...) /ccboard/images/graemlins/smile.gif

Rod
06-02-2003, 11:53 AM
Sid,
I've played for some sobering amounts. I treat it like a job and I won't do a half A$$ job. I think I just became immune to the ups and downs that gambling can bring for some. I do my job and go home. Most of the time it was/is good enough. If it wasn't good enough, then so be it. I'll just file that info away for future use if necessary. One thing, like I said before I'll not dwell on the past. I just don't need the roller coaster ride. A $70 bill for time would tweak me especially if it was a cheap bet. Some where along the line I would have raised the bet so someone would pay the time. I don't know what your situation was but i'd be aware of how much time could be.

Rod

Sid_Vicious
06-02-2003, 02:49 PM
"I don't know what your situation was but i'd be aware of how much time could be."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Since my ID was not on this table, it appeared(IMO)as if I was conveniently being assessed the time tab by default, instead of the guy literally handing the balls over the counter. THAT, is where my angry level kicked in pertaining to the house, which by the way gathers a neat little income from me on Saturdays and Sundays enjoying the cold ones. Why I did not confront the bar management right there on the spot is my mistake...I simply accepted that I was being treated descriminitively(sp?), copped an attitude and blew out of the joint. About two weeks of nothing but ice water, along with the familiar buck tip for the pitcher of the cold agua, and getting the heck outta there before prime time starts...I figure to capture the coin back, plus be a little healthier while I'm at it.

I'll close this thread now, as nobody like to read angry, gouging dribble for long. My mistake in not contesting it...sid~~~power is in the pocket book

Sid_Vicious
06-02-2003, 02:56 PM
Now there's an invite that'll work! You ever get that Bungee to working???sid

Hopster
06-03-2003, 01:12 AM
How do you deal with your guilty inner thoughts "the day after"??? &lt;--sid

I used to get up,look in the bathroom mirror and say : Another fine f###### mess you got me into.
Then i would go out and look to get even and think no more about it.
If it bothers you to the point where its hurting your lifestyle or your mind, give it up for a bit. Action will always be there, always.

Predator314
06-03-2003, 05:48 AM
It's sad to say, but I believe if you gamble frequently, you get de-sensitized to losing. I hate losing. I'm not a sore loser, I just hate it. If I lose a good amount gambling, I have the ability to brush it off. It helps to have a good job to get the money back though /ccboard/images/graemlins/smile.gif

cheesemouse
06-03-2003, 06:33 AM
Sid,
[ QUOTE ]
All I want is advice or philosophies for getting desensitized to the guilt. Things like "well it's only money" or "well I won their cash last time" are examples, and yet those are sounding like a broken record these days to me.
<hr /></blockquote>

In the past when I was looking for action on a daily bases the question of the day always seemed to be who does one play, for how much and is this a good decision? I think most players who like to match up/gamble know before they leave the house whether they're going to gamble that day or not; what they don't usually know is who and for how much. In order to give yourself/myself some direct or guide line in this dilema; the dilema being the endless negotiations and or wolfing that normally goes on before the balls are broke I would count my bullets before I left the house. For example: if I had $200 fun money/fun coupons I would divide by 10 giving myself 10 bullets. I figured the 10 bullets would give me a chance to win in most situations...now that I had my ducks in a row before entering the p/h I would take any game that fell within my bullets for the day. Sometimes you win and some times you loose...LOL...but atleast I knew what my limits where to begin that days action. If anybody was propossing a game that fell outside my 10 bullet range he got no action from me and I would pass on the game, if on the other hand a game was in my range I would except and let the games begin without further delay. Of course when your winning and your opponent wishes to raise the bet the value of your bullets has change and you adjust within that new range.....The next morning when I looked in that mirror on the wall the only time I would feel quilty was those mornings when I'd lost and hadn't follow my own rules.

...sorry for the wandering explaination but I haven't matched up for a while.....

Ralph S.
06-03-2003, 07:11 AM
I dont really know how to answer that question Sid. I have never given it much thought as gambling doesnt bother me. I have been know to bet to roaches running across the floor LOL. Maybe all I can say is that gambling money definitely has no home. /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

SpiderMan
06-03-2003, 11:38 AM
Nothing out of the ordinary, just a too-common padding of the tab at the Click's out east. Max rate was (I think) $8 an hour for the table. We played for 7 hours, the first two of which were supposed to be on lower (daytime) rates, paid cash for all our drinks, and still got stuck for $70. Like Sid, we did the math a little too late to raise a fuss.

I have another friend, Quenton, here in Dallas who felt he was always overcharged at Click's Marsh. Always about half again as many drinks as he felt he actually had. But, like many, he always had had enough that he wasn't sure of the count.

Finally Quenton did an experiment. He went in early Saturday afternoon (pool is free then), and took care to only have one bourbon and coke all day. After about 4 hours he tabbed out and was charged for several extra drinks. Raised holy hell and didn't have to pay, now we are all convinced that Click's bartenders pad the tabs to cover free drinks they pour for their friends.

SpiderMan

tateuts
06-03-2003, 12:13 PM
Sid,

It's healthy to feel bad about losing money.

My suggestion would be to take whatever you're going to gamble with, and consider that money "spent" - under the expense category of "entertainment". Then, if you win, wonderful/great/whatever. If you lose, so what, the money was spent anyway.

It doesn't bother me to lose or to lose money. What bothers me is playing bad. If I play bad, then I feel bad. If I play my game and still lose, then it's pool. After all, if you played a mirror image of yourself, one of you would still lose.

Chris

Deeman
06-03-2003, 12:54 PM
Spiderman,

Thanks, I was suspicious that was what you were referring to. I've been there, done that, and been too embarrassed to complain. I'll start marking my drinks on my sleeve....