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MarkUrsel
08-12-2003, 09:19 AM
So, after a 3-month layoff from pool, and league looming large in the windshield, I need to get my game back.

I’ve consulted friends and teachers, and all of them tell me that I need to practice.

Practice?? What?? This isn’t the American way!

I want instant improvement, instant results, instant gratification! Are you seriously telling me that there is no magic pool bullet? No billiard rust-removing milkshakes? There’s no “cueagra” that will make me play better, play longer and get more satisfaction?

Well I’m shocked. I thought it would be easier than this. Is there hypnosis or shock therapy? Subliminal therapy? Aromatherapy?

All these friends and instructors say that they will WORK with me; show me drills, tapes, even things like mindsets and – God forbid – strategy. They say if I WORK at it and PRACTICE, that I’ll get better over time.

Well that dog don’t hunt.

I’m heading to the drugstore, the psychiatrist and the psychic. Someone out there will show me how to get my game back without having to actually, like, DO anything.

I know it.

PQQLK9
08-12-2003, 10:11 AM
Hope you find your game soon....I actually enjoy practice...can do it for hours on end. Still striving for that ever elusive consistency.

dave
08-12-2003, 10:30 AM
Quote: "..WORK with me; show me drills, tapes, even things like mindsets and ; God forbid ; strategy. They say if I WORK at it and PRACTICE, that I'll get better over time..."

You forgot: " READ A BOOK!!!??? "

MarkUrsel
08-12-2003, 11:32 AM
That's what started the whole thing.

Was reading Capelle's book on 9 ball. Got to the end of it, and while there were a lot of good things in the book, I realized I hadn't touched the cue in a couple of weeks.

I've been reading everything I can find about how to improve my game but not practicing. Looking for the magic pill.

I went out and played a bit this weekend, and surprise! I shot like crap. Played position like my hands were made of concrete. Had the touch of a surgeon. A tree surgeon. Shape was either a foot short or three feet long.

There ain't no cure but table time.

Rod
08-12-2003, 12:07 PM
[ QUOTE ]
There ain't no cure but table time.
<hr /></blockquote>


Mark,
Isn't that the truth. Buy books, tapes etc and it won't help. Some people would have to practice several hours if not days or maybe weeks for what they learn in a 1 hour tape. I don't see many doing that, instead they like to just play.

I'm a little like you, if I don't get out and practice and play some my finesse game stinks. It gets better real quick though if I actually play two days in a row. What a nightmare!, having to spent that much time. LOL

Rod

Eric.
08-12-2003, 01:06 PM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote MarkUrsel:</font><hr> I’m heading to the drugstore, <hr /></blockquote>

Drugs! It's bozos like you, that can't run three balls, and SL3's teaching other SL3's , promotiing drug abuse that are the problem, I have seen babies, families, states, and even whole countries devastated by drugs, you bozos can all go to hell, my dog can make balls in to pockets and i will ride his coattails til the day he winds up with all 4 paws in the air, which is why you promoting drugs is the worst thing since Small Pox, you bozos know nothing, I was taught by Minnesota Fats, who was a so-so poolplayer, which that is all the credentials you need to know, bozo, why don't you all get off my back, if you want tips buy my book, buy my video, why don't you just send me a check and I'll fill in the blanks, you are all giant nobody's, you don't know S***, you are all just jealous of me, thats why you are all trying to run me down, get off my back you bozos,......... /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif


Eric &gt;bored

pooljunkie73
08-12-2003, 01:16 PM
lmao /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

sounds familiar.

Kent Mc.

MarkUrsel
08-12-2003, 01:23 PM
[ QUOTE ]
Drugs! It's bozos like you, that can't run three balls <hr /></blockquote>
I'll have you know that I've run FOUR balls. Once. Wait, no, twice.
[ QUOTE ]
I was taught by Minnesota Fats, who was a so-so poolplayer, which that is all the credentials you need to know, bozo, why don't you all get off my back, if you want tips buy my book, buy my video, why don't you just send me a check and I'll fill in the blanks, you are all giant nobody's, you don't know S***, you are all just jealous of me, thats why you are all trying to run me down, get off my back you bozos <hr /></blockquote>
I stand corrected, nay, HUMBLED at your greatness - well at least your great rant. Brings back the old days, don't it?
[ QUOTE ]
my dog can make balls in to pockets and i will ride his coattails til the day he winds up with all 4 paws in the air <hr /></blockquote>
...and your little dog, too!

As for drugs, got $10 worth of whatever you were on when you wrote that?? /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

-- Mark &lt;-- almost as bored

Wally_in_Cincy
08-12-2003, 01:58 PM
Eric,

I'm going to have to give you a karate chop.

VINNIE, VEEDIE, VICHY. contemplate, agitate, mastur...er...never mind

Sincerely

Fast Larry

Eric.
08-12-2003, 02:01 PM
I've seen your Karate stance.

Actually, it looked like your Depends were full.


Eric &gt;don't forget to wipe

Snyder1
08-13-2003, 07:15 AM
I'm surprised nobody else commented on your title block phrase ... I recall it from an old episode of WKRP in Cincinnati ... LOL !!

JS

Barbara
08-13-2003, 07:40 AM
Yep! Good ole' Less Nessman, the weatherman said that!

Barbara~~~still has a few brain cells left...

hemicudas
08-13-2003, 07:10 PM
Mark, I believe some here are missing the point. You obviously penned this thread with mirth in your heart and I for one think you are one of the funniest guys I have ever read. Tremendously well written. It's a shame that subtlety isn't recognized by all. "CUEAGRA?"... Too, too funny.

Fran Crimi
08-13-2003, 08:09 PM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote MarkUrsel:</font><hr>
There ain't no cure but table time.

<hr /></blockquote>

Mark, table time is overrated. Incentive is all you need. Stick a 9-ball under your pillow at night. Add a ball for every night you play badly. Eventually you'll play great just to keep from adding another ball. Works for me. /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

Fran

Qtec
08-13-2003, 08:19 PM
How do you know he wont get jail for stealing all those balls . /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

What if he is a masochist ? /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

Q

nAz
08-13-2003, 08:45 PM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote Snyder1:</font><hr> I'm surprised nobody else commented on your title block phrase ... I recall it from an old episode of WKRP in Cincinnati ... LOL !!

JS <hr /></blockquote>


That was a funny a$$ show, that episode was really halarious.

Rod
08-13-2003, 09:14 PM
It was funny, if I remember any of them that would be the one. Lets see, Les was throwing them out of a helicopter? It was Thanksgiving, right? Who remembers?

Snyder1
08-13-2003, 09:27 PM
Yep ... Mr. Carlson said they hit the pavement like bags of wet cement !! LOL !!!!

JS

Rod
08-13-2003, 10:17 PM
Thats right, thud-splat. LOL

MarkUrsel
08-14-2003, 04:35 AM
It was a spoof of the radio reporter at the scene of the Hindenburg. Les was the reporter on the ground, Mr. Carlson in the helicopter.

"Oh my God, they're bombing the mall with turkeys! They're hitting the ground like sacks of wet cement! Look out! Look out! Oh the humanity..."

That episode just kills me. It has absolutely nothing to do with the topic of the post, but who's does?

Fran, I'll try that, it has to be better than actually working at it! /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

SPetty
08-14-2003, 09:30 AM
Check it out:

http://www.cpol.net/tuneman/turkeysfly.wav

From this site:

http://www.cpol.net/tuneman/wkrpwavs.html

Or this:
“It's a helicopter, and it's coming this way. It's flying something behind it, I can't quite make it out, it's a large banner and it says, uh - Happy... Thaaaaanksss... giving! ... From ... W ... K ... R... P!! No parachutes yet. Can't be skydivers... I can't tell just yet what they are, but - Oh my God, Johnny, they're turkeys!! Johnny, can you get this? Oh, they're plunging to the earth right in front of our eyes! One just went through the windshield of a parked car! Oh, the humanity! The turkeys are hitting the ground like sacks of wet cement! Not since the Hindenberg tragedy has there been anything like this!”

from here:
http://radio.about.com/library/blwkrpturkey.htm

Followed by this:
http://www.cpol.net/tuneman/johnturkeybombed.wav

Thanks for the memories! /ccboard/images/graemlins/laugh.gif