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View Full Version : Only in a pool hall <humor>



Ralph S.
10-05-2003, 03:12 AM
I was at my local hall tonight {Saturday} and while playing a set with a guy when this woman walks up after seeing my cues leaning against the cue holder and promptly grabs the shortest cue and starts to walk off with it. She did this right with me sitting next to them.

I said to her,"why are you taking off with my cue"? I was amused more than annoyed. She replied: "well, I need a short cue". I tried like hell to convince her that it was not a regular pool cue and kindly asked her to put it back.

She retorted back: "Its not your stick. it belongs to the pool room". She finally got upset and stormed off after saying: "what do you know anyway".

The cue she grabbed? My masse cue. /ccboard/images/graemlins/laugh.gif

dg-in-centralpa
10-05-2003, 06:25 AM
Was she blond, could you see light through her ears, seems that she isn't the sharpest knife in the drawer.
Oh well...
DG

NH_Steve
10-05-2003, 11:11 AM
I haven't seen that with a short cue, but have certainly seen pretty obviously custom cues start to walk away /ccboard/images/graemlins/smile.gif

Back when I worked at a poolroom in college, we had one 5x10 billiard table and nine pool tables. We didn't assign tables -- just gave them the rack of balls and let 'em pick their own. I always enjoyed watching the newbies go to the billiard table -- wondering how far they would go before they realized they were no pockets! Many racked the balls -- and a few broke, before I felt guilty &amp; sent them to a real pool table /ccboard/images/graemlins/smile.gif

UTAddb
10-05-2003, 12:16 PM
Everyone does that on the snooker table at my school and wonders why they can't make anything. I had my viking leaning on a chair once and some guy came up and said "I'm gonna take this, alright?" "Oh that's your cue."

plato 17
10-05-2003, 02:08 PM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote Ralph S.:</font><hr> I was at my local hall tonight {Saturday} and while playing a set with a guy when this woman walks up after seeing my cues leaning against the cue holder and promptly grabs the shortest cue and starts to walk off with it. She did this right with me sitting next to them.


This is sort of funny, the poor thing made a mistake, then realized it, became embarassed, and to save face, got mad and took off. In her defense, you sir are about one out of 10,000 who is running around with a masse cue. Nobody even knows what one is, let alone what one looks like, and in the female non pro world, that is 100%. 10 years ago I was playing a match using my balabuska and I won the set, the opponent gave me the money and left, I layed my cue down on the table and walked over to the bar to get a beer, the bar was 30' from the table.

I thought I was keeping my eye on the table and the cue. When I returned to the table, the buska was gone. If you want to ever experience a 10.0 panic attack, that was it. I ran out the door to see if any one was in the parking lot with it, empty. I began to now get seriously sick, I had been had, right in front of my nose. Just in case, somebody had moved it, or hidden it, I began a methodical search of every table and person playing, seeing if the cue was behind a chair or under the table. On the other side of the room was some geek nerd twit playing with my cue.

I walked up astonished saying, that's my cue, the geek goes, it's a house cue, I saw it laying on a table, it had a good tip, so I just picked it up. I go, does this look like a house cue, he goes, I don't know. Thoughts of killing him with my bare hands on the spot quickly subsided by the joy of getting my cue back, so I let him live. The point was, he could have walked right out the door and made a clean get away with my $10,000 cue.

The next day, the cue went into a safe deposit box and has not hit a ball since. Now when I go to the bar to get a beer, or to the rest room, my cue goes with me. The moral of this story is you have some really dumb people in pool halls, and it's mostly the freshman class who don't no nothing, but they will some day. We all have to begin learning which end is up in a pool hall, we all went through it. /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

8 ball ho
10-05-2003, 03:17 PM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote dg-in-centralpa:</font><hr> Was she blond, could you see light through her ears, seems that she isn't the sharpest knife in the drawer.
Oh well...
DG <hr /></blockquote>


I am blond, I am not an air head, and you macho pigs think you are funny with your little jokes. Most blonds view you as nothing but hairy Neanderthals with your knuckles dragging on the jungle floor, most blonds avoid sexist pigs like you. That is why you probably never got laid by a blond.

The reason there are no women on this board, real women, not the pro players who are not real women, is because your sexist attitudes run them off. They realize they are not welcome here, it's this little macho man boys club, you have a sign up, no women, no dogs allowed.
Most of you guys think you are so cool, you are not. Most of you make love like a Mike Tyson prize fight, 15 rounds is scheduled by you, but every one knows, it's over in the first 60 seconds of the first round. Try showing women a little respect when they come on, more might post, or is that why you insult them when they come on, you dont want them posting, oh I forgot your sign over the door, no women, no dogs. A blond, who has a masters degree.

pooljunkie73
10-05-2003, 03:42 PM
Hey 8 ball ho, could you tell us what you really think?

Kent Mc.

ras314
10-05-2003, 03:48 PM
"you are funny with your little jokes. Most blonds view you as nothing but hairy Neanderthals with your knuckles dragging on the jungle floor, most blonds avoid sexist pigs like you. That is why you probably never got laid by a blond."

Sure hope you arn't a polelock blond. /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif Besides real blonds are scarce. Post us a picture ?

dg-in-centralpa
10-05-2003, 05:35 PM
Obviously something struck a nerve with you. I've been with blondes and they all acted like they were doing me a favor by letting me screw them. They were like a dead fish. In fact Frank Zappa wrote a song that could serve as the anthem for you blondes. Check the album "Apostrophe" and the song "Dinah Moe Hum". Brunettes and redheads are more to my liking, they are wild. As it happens, my wife is a blond, and is quite satisfied with me.
As for not being respectful of women on this board, I would suggest that you read some of my previous posts, as well as other people. We are very respectful of the women and the pro women and their opinions, who by the way, are real women. Why don't we talk about your moniker here or your hobbies? I'm sure that would make for great conversation.

DG - who can last for more than 10 seconds

Rod
10-05-2003, 07:24 PM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote dg-in-centralpa:</font><hr>
DG - who can last for more than 10 seconds
<hr /></blockquote>

I have 10, do I hear 20? I have 20, Do I hear 30? lol

Ralph S.
10-06-2003, 12:10 AM
dg, Yes she was blonde. No bull, blonde and a few french fries short of a happy meal. /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

Ralph S.
10-06-2003, 12:13 AM
LMFAO Rod. I will be an hour so getting back in my chair after falling out from laughing so hard. /ccboard/images/graemlins/laugh.gif

dg-in-centralpa
10-06-2003, 05:48 AM
I rest my case.

DG

griffith_d
10-06-2003, 06:34 AM
Why do you call yourself a "ho",...maybe it is because of the way you are.

Griff

Fred Agnir
10-06-2003, 07:18 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote 8 ball ho:</font><hr> <blockquote><font class="small">Quote dg-in-centralpa:</font><hr> Was she blond, could you see light through her ears, seems that she isn't the sharpest knife in the drawer.
Oh well...
DG <hr /></blockquote>


I am blond, I am not an air head, and you macho pigs think you are funny with your little jokes. Most blonds view you as nothing but hairy Neanderthals with your knuckles dragging on the jungle floor, most blonds avoid sexist pigs like you. That is why you probably never got laid by a blond. <hr /></blockquote>

I'd take you a little more seriously if your user ID wasn't so degrading to women.

Fred

Fred Agnir
10-06-2003, 07:21 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote plato 17:</font><hr> In her defense, you sir are about one out of 10,000 who is running around with a masse cue. <hr /></blockquote>
I'm guessing you have too many zeroes up there.

Fred &lt;~~~ never considered buying a massť cue, let alone taking it out locked &amp; loaded

Fred Agnir
10-06-2003, 07:26 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote dg-in-centralpa:</font><hr> Obviously something struck a nerve with you. <hr /></blockquote>
I hate to be thought of as the netiquette police, but... I have to make sure Qtec doesn't have meat to point out any hypocrisy.

I think your post was inappropriate. So was hers.

Now, kiss and make up.

Fred

Optimus_P
10-06-2003, 07:44 AM
luckly there are more then blonds on this planet.

as far as the "sex slams" take it to the playboy forums, this is no place for it.

yeah as other said, we would prolly take you more serious if your username wasnt a negitive reflection on your gender. or are you also a gardner?

magicman
10-06-2003, 09:33 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote griffith_d:</font><hr> Why do you call yourself a "ho",...maybe it is because of the way you are.

Griff <hr /></blockquote>


Griff, that's not it, it's a way of talking, I grab da ho and go to the pool hall, my ho is better lookin than yo ho, do you ever listen to rap dude. /ccboard/images/graemlins/blush.gif

8 ball ho
10-06-2003, 09:51 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote ras314:</font><hr>

"you are funny with your little jokes. Most blonds view you as nothing but hairy Neanderthals with your knuckles dragging on the jungle floor, most blonds avoid sexist pigs like you. That is why you probably never got laid by a blond."

Sure hope you arn't a polelock blond. /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif Besides real blonds are scarce. Post us a picture ? <hr /></blockquote>


Yes I am a real blond, my collars and cuffs match. There you go again, I now have to post my picture, why, there is your macho sexist attitude at work. Why don't you post a picture of you, wear something low cut, hang a little boobie out for me to lust at. /ccboard/images/graemlins/mad.gif

8 ball ho
10-06-2003, 09:55 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote Fred Agnir:</font><hr> <blockquote><font class="small">Quote dg-in-centralpa:</font><hr> Obviously something struck a nerve with you. <hr /></blockquote>
I hate to be thought of as the netiquette police, but... I have to make sure Qtec doesn't have meat to point out any hypocrisy.

I think your post was inappropriate. So was hers.

Now, kiss and make up.

Fred <hr /></blockquote>

Fred, I would rather kiss the rear end of a pig, which is what he is. Ok, since you asked, I'll clean it up if he cleans up his sexist act up as well. Glad to know Fred you are the chief of the sex police, it's a lousy job Fred, but somebody has to do it. /ccboard/images/graemlins/blush.gif

Vicki
10-06-2003, 10:32 AM
Easy there, killer! Most 8 ball ho's don't know a masse cue from a broom stick. I've had more than a few ho's mistake my custom cues for house cues. At least this ho was looking for a short cue and likely found the only one in the pool room. She's just a girl, after all! /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

Funny how most of the ho's trying to take my cues are boys. Blond boys with a masters degree. /ccboard/images/graemlins/laugh.gif

The best are the common ho's that pull the balls from the ball return and roll them up table to be racked. I like how they always have to go back to get the rack from the other end of the table. Those ho's have PhD's! /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

Vicki

griffith_d
10-06-2003, 10:34 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote magicman:</font><hr> <blockquote><font class="small">Quote griffith_d:</font><hr> Why do you call yourself a "ho",...maybe it is because of the way you are.

Griff <hr /></blockquote>


Griff, that's not it, it's a way of talking, I grab da ho and go to the pool hall, my ho is better lookin than yo ho, do you ever listen to rap dude. /ccboard/images/graemlins/blush.gif <hr /></blockquote>

Duh,...of course it is a way of talking,...she is calling herself a "ho".

Griff

Voodoo Daddy
10-06-2003, 10:36 AM
If your really in Key West, say hi to Farah &amp; Janna at the Stick~n~Stien for me...tell her BIG PAPPA is still alive and kickin'

Voodoo~~~aka BIG STEVE, BIG PAPPA and the guy your momma wants you to bring home &lt;Yeah, right&gt;

Optimus_P
10-06-2003, 11:31 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote 8 ball ho:</font><hr>
Yes I am a real blond, my collars and cuffs match.<hr /></blockquote>

niCe, now we are getting somewhere.

i would post a pic but it wont let me add an attachment.

9 Ball Road Pro
10-07-2003, 12:35 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote Vicki:</font><hr> Easy there, killer! Most 8 ball ho's don't know a masse cue from a broom stick. I've had more than a few ho's mistake my custom cues for house cues. At least this ho was looking for a short cue and likely found the only one in the pool room. She's just a girl, after all! /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

Funny how most of the ho's trying to take my cues are boys. Blond boys with a masters degree. /ccboard/images/graemlins/laugh.gif

The best are the common ho's that pull the balls from the ball return and roll them up table to be racked. I like how they always have to go back to get the rack from the other end of the table. Those ho's have PhD's! /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

Vicki <hr /></blockquote>



Damn, now we got two of them on the war path, you guys better cool it fast, these cats will deball you before you know it. /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

Vicki
10-07-2003, 12:45 PM
Don't worry. I don't have any plans to deball any of the men here. I am quite amused by the average recreational pool players that show up to drink beer and hang out with their buds on a weekend night. They do the stupidist things and are so completely clueless!

In all seriousness though, the pool room can, for women, be quite an intimidating place. I remember feeling very self-conscious and foolish that I was so not-in-the-know. It's no wonder that the lady who accidentally picked up the "masse cue" reacted so strongly when it's owner corrected her for her mistake. I'm sure she felt foolish but really the only foolish one was the man who wrongly assumed that everyone must know what a "masse cue" is. I assume it's the same as a jump cue? I've been playing for more than 15 years.

I'm not mad at anyone, though. I was being sarccastic in my first post. The one I am really making fun of is the one who is making such an ass of herself with her angry posts about female equality AND who is a self-described Pool Room Whore. Sorry but it doesn't sit well with me.

Your gonads are safe! /ccboard/images/graemlins/laugh.gif

\Vicki

8 ball ho
10-08-2003, 09:23 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote Optimus_P:</font><hr> <blockquote><font class="small">Quote 8 ball ho:</font><hr>
Yes I am a real blond, my collars and cuffs match.<hr /></blockquote>

niCe, now we are getting somewhere.

That is because the board software is keyed in to only allow picutes of pretty people to go up, if your picture was of a old and ugly person, it will not attach. /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

i would post a pic but it wont let me add an attachment. <hr /></blockquote>

ManlyShot
10-08-2003, 09:27 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote 8 ball ho:</font><hr>i would post a pic but it wont let me add an attachment.<hr /></blockquote>

You don't need to, 8 Ball Ho. We already know what Plato_17, Danny D, and you look like.

ManlyShot

plato 17
10-08-2003, 09:38 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote Vicki:</font><hr> Don't worry. I don't have any plans to deball any of the men here. I am quite amused by the average recreational pool players that show up to drink beer and hang out with their buds on a weekend night. They do the stupidist things and are so completely clueless!

In all seriousness though, the pool room can, for women, be quite an intimidating place. I remember feeling very self-conscious and foolish that I was so not-in-the-know. It's no wonder that the lady who accidentally picked up the "masse cue" reacted so strongly when it's owner corrected her for her mistake. I'm sure she felt foolish but really the only foolish one was the man who wrongly assumed that everyone must know what a "masse cue" is. I assume it's the same as a jump cue? I've been playing for more than 15 years.

I'm not mad at anyone, though. I was being sarccastic in my first post. The one I am really making fun of is the one who is making such an ass of herself with her angry posts about female equality AND who is a self-described Pool Room Whore. Sorry but it doesn't sit well with me.

Your gonads are safe! /ccboard/images/graemlins/laugh.gif

\Vicki <hr /></blockquote>


Dear Vicki, you called the ho a whorie, there is a difference, a big difference. A lot of guys call their girlfriend a ho, and they do not have her working the street supporting them. It's a rap thing, obviously you are into elevator music or Glenn Miller songs. Did we just assume she is white, perhaps she is black, calling ladies a ho is much more prevelant in that society than in the white world. In that world, it does not have the whorie thing with it. Everyone there, has a Ho.
There are a lot of black ladies running around with blond or red heads, there is dye and wigs.

To explain what a masse cue is, it looks exactly like a short jump cue, it is basically the same length.
The jump cue will be l2 to 7 oz, the masse cue will be 19 to 25 oz. Yes, the lady would not have been able to tell, and the guy could have quietly told her, but instead, he probably embarassed her in front of everyone else which is why she apparently ran out of the door. We probably just lost a pool player for life over than bone head move. Why are you so senstive to ho's in the pool world, tell us how Robin Dobson made her living in the early days. There are good ho's and bad ho's. Robin is now a good ho, and maybe 8 ball has nothing but a funny name, nothing more to it than that. Until you learn more, I would reserve judgement. /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

Icon of Sin
10-08-2003, 09:51 AM
[ QUOTE ]
Try showing women a little respect when they come on<hr /></blockquote>
This is coming from a girl that calls herself a ho... unbelievable

Optimus_P
10-08-2003, 10:29 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote 8 ball ho:</font><hr>That is because the board software is keyed in to only allow picutes of pretty people to go up, if your picture was of a old and ugly person, it will not attach. /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif
<hr /></blockquote>

call it how you see it. ho.

i can see you are an ace at arguments.
here let me try to kneel down to your level.
i know you are but what am i.

did it ever occure that she really is a dumb blond? lord knows they are not all working for a think tank.

Vicki
10-08-2003, 11:04 AM
Thanks for the laugh. Call me old fashioned, call me a prude, but I don't think taking words that have a derogatory meaning and turning them into a term of endearment is cool. I am not old, don't listen to elevator music, and don't care for rap music. Although I've never met her, I sincerely doubt Robin Dodson would appreciate being called a ho (whether it be a "good ho" or otherwise) or the inference that she may have begun her career in any type of manner that that word would be applicable. She has always made a good impression and for all I know she is nothing less than utterly professional. I'd not use that term to label anyone, least of all myself, no matter what the situation. I know there are MANY derogatory words that are now used with a different intended meaning and that's fine for other people. I was just poking a little fun at it, don't be so uptight.

Vicki

magicman
10-08-2003, 12:22 PM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote Vicki:</font><hr> Thanks for the laugh. Call me old fashioned, call me a prude, but I don't think taking words that have a derogatory meaning and turning them into a term of endearment is cool. I am not old, don't listen to elevator music, and don't care for rap music. Although I've never met her, I sincerely doubt Robin Dodson would appreciate being called a ho (whether it be a "good ho" or otherwise) or the inference that she may have begun her career in any type of manner that that word would be applicable. She has always made a good impression and for all I know she is nothing less than utterly professional. I'd not use that term to label anyone, least of all myself, no matter what the situation. I know there are MANY derogatory words that are now used with a different intended meaning and that's fine for other people. I was just poking a little fun at it, don't be so uptight.

Vicki <hr /></blockquote>


Well Vicki you are right about one thing, there are too many people here too up tight about too many things. A little humor and a little more fun and some stories would be in order, bring them on I say. Quit fighting with each other, have fun with each other. /ccboard/images/graemlins/cool.gif

Rod
10-08-2003, 05:32 PM
Vickie, I appreciate what you said in the above posts and the humor. We all have our moments at the pool room. I don't think it was about what kind of cue, but rather that it was his cue. He just let her know just like you would anyone, it's not your property. Masse cues have been around for a few years. I've never owned one, I just use my regular cue.

Rod

Ralph S.
10-09-2003, 02:16 AM
To Vickie and the others that think I embarrassed this lady. I want to let it be known I did no such thing. I actually found it laughable because she thought the cue belonged to the ph and not me. That was where I could not convince her otherwise. I did not raise my voice or make any rude comments to her. I just tried to explain to her the difference between the cues. As for why I had it out, was because I had been practicincing some certain shots and simply had not put it away yet. It would be nice if everybody just read what was actually posted instead of trying to read into a post and add things that were not originally in it.

Fred Agnir
10-09-2003, 06:32 AM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote Ralph S.:</font><hr> It would be nice if everybody just read what was actually posted instead of trying to read into a post and add things that were not originally in it. <hr /></blockquote>Amen to that. Been fighting it for years.

Fred &lt;~~~ black and white, that's all there is (other than smileys)

Rod
10-09-2003, 09:06 AM
[ QUOTE ]
To Vickie and the others that think I embarrassed this lady. I want to let it be known I did no such thing. I actually found it laughable because she thought the cue belonged to the ph and not me. That was where I could not convince her otherwise. I did not raise my voice or make any rude comments to her. I just tried to explain to her the difference between the cues. <hr /></blockquote>

I never figured you did Ralph. BTW what are you doing with a masse' cue? Do you shoot them often? Do you have a little road show we should know about? /ccboard/images/graemlins/laugh.gif LOL Just curious

Rod

Vicki
10-09-2003, 09:45 AM
Hey Ralph, I don't think you intentionally embarrassed the lady. You seem like a real nice guy to me! /ccboard/images/graemlins/cool.gif I think people like us who have been around pool for a long time just forget how intimidating a place the pool room can be for newcomers. That's all.

I'm guilty too so don't think I was picking on ya! Remember, I admitted to laughing out loud at the guys who rack the balls at the wrong end of the table!

Certainly you had to tell her it was your cue and certainly she had a stronger reaction than was called for. I just wanted to point out that her reaction was likely because she was embarrassed - not that you intentionally embarrassed her. Sorry for any harm done! You're good in my book.

Vicki

9 Ball Girl
10-09-2003, 10:01 AM
I remember pi$$ing a girl off. She was with her BF and another couple. They had their bridge under their table where it belongs. I was practicing on the table next to their's by myself wondering why in the hell, out of all the tables in the room that were available, they'd give the one next to me out. Anyway, I had put my bridgehead on my break cue and rested it against the wall. The girl comes over and grabs my cue and I smiled and said:

Me: That's my cue.
Her: Well, I have to use it. (rolled her eyes at me and sucked her teeth!)
Me: (anger building but still calm) No, see, you have your own down there. (I pointed to their's)
Her BF: What the f***s the difference?
Me: (no longer holding back the anger) If you were REAL poolplayers, you'd see that this is not a house cue! That's what the f***s the difference! (grabbed my cue back)

I only got like that 'cause they came off snotty to me first. I've had instances where my cue gets picked up and I'm cool about it 'cause I stop them right away and I understand that they can't tell the difference. I was there once before a long time ago. /ccboard/images/graemlins/wink.gif

Ralph S.
10-09-2003, 08:23 PM
No road show Rod. But, yes I have actually pulled it out in a couple of tourneys for a some attempts that were left to me due to some killer safes played against me. The results from the use of it so far are about 50% success rate in my favor. /ccboard/images/graemlins/laugh.gif

Kato
10-09-2003, 08:52 PM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote Vicki:</font><hr> The best are the common ho's that pull the balls from the ball return and roll them up table to be racked. I like how they always have to go back to get the rack from the other end of the table. Those ho's have PhD's! /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

Vicki, I just got around to reading this thread and this has always cracked me up /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif Interestingly enough, these PhD's are usually guys trying to impress women. My friends and I love laughing at this. Seems like an awful lot of work to me though /ccboard/images/graemlins/tongue.gif

Kato

Vicki <hr /></blockquote>

JoePickens
10-10-2003, 03:03 PM
Hmmm...does that mean then it is a 50 percent success rate for your opponent? /ccboard/images/graemlins/wink.gif

just_shootme
10-10-2003, 07:12 PM
a little off the subject. but it kills me when I am playing a guy a set for cash and I may play a very thought out safety and I hear the ever so insulting comment "thats ni**er pool"! lol

Ask the HO if she even plays pool?

I sware if I had a doller for all of the uneducated white trash ive taken money from.

billy bob
10-10-2003, 08:47 PM
hows ya all doin? it is me billy bob. Paw said to do my reading an rightin before i talkt to ya all again. he said be away from big city folks stoopid. Never had no teachin but we play some pool. Our old tabel is kind of crapy it has crap all over. crap i play more bad than all of ya all, the tabel is out in the barn dam chikns. i kows what ure typng yor sayn a black word. paw says have repsect and i aint sayn them word. ifin i am trash then i am. some of them fokls are workin 1 mile down. boy that brew done got a buz on me. heck i done forgot but leve coler out,, i ispesses me off.

your friend billy bob