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9 Ball Girl
10-18-2003, 10:21 AM
My friend sent this to me. I think he found it in the NY Times:

Ready for Game 8

October 18, 2003
By JOHN KENNEY

This is it. Winner takes all. Unless the Yankees win and
force a Game 9. In which case the winner of that game goes
to the World Series. Unless the Red Sox lose that game,
too, thereby forcing a Game 10. Should the Yankees win,
they'd move on to Game 11, giving Boston yet another
chance.

On the mound for the Red Sox in Game 8, working on just one
day's rest, will be Pedro Martinez, accompanied by John
Smoltz of the Atlanta Braves, Randy Johnson of the Arizona
Diamondbacks, and the singer Norah Jones. Grady Little, the
Boston manager, said, "It's an unusual rotation, as well as
being technically illegal, but these are top-rate pitchers
as well as a truly gifted singer, and well, it's Game 8 and
that's what you do in these situations."

Game time is 4:15 p.m., though the Yankees are under the
impression that the game begins at 8 p.m. The Red Sox, in
association with Major League Baseball, feel that this will
give them the opportunity to establish an early lead. "The
four-hour jump is really going to help the ball club," said
Theo Epstein, the Red Sox general manager.

Boston has not won a World Series since the American Civil
War. During that time the team has carried with it the
burden of an alleged curse - caused, some say, by the sale
of Babe Ruth to the Yankees. Nomar Garciaparra, the Red Sox
shortstop, spoke to reporters about the curse. "I was
talking with Jason Varitek after the game," he said. "We
both just read the new biography of Sylvia Plath and I was
saying that, in many ways, our experience as a ball club is
much like Ms. Plath's - passionate, yes. Creative, yes. And
yet in many ways deeply troubled. Of course, if you think
about it, the Yankees, overbearing, dominant, are very much
like Ted Hughes. I guess the only difference is that we've
never committed suicide. Although we've certainly thought
about it."

"There's no curse," said Epstein, as he accompanied a
Jamaican high priestess, Yocasta LaPierre, while she
sprinkled chicken blood around home plate.

Reached for comment, Joe Torre, the Yankees manager,
reacted with surprise: "I had no idea there was going to be
a Game 8. I thought we won Thursday night. Also, I feel our
best work is far less sentimental than Plath's or Hughes's.
Except for Matsui and Zim, who don't speak English, we're
much more in the Billy Collins school."

Another change that will take place during the game is the
removal of second and third base when the Red Sox are
batting. "We've noticed that second and third bases are
troublesome for the Red Sox, especially later in the game,"
said Bud Selig, commissioner of Major League Baseball. With
the removal of the two bases, according to a diagram
released by the commissioner's office, Sox baserunners
would be allowed to proceed from first base directly to
home plate.

Selig said he would address the new "blindfold" rule for
the Yankee hitters in the No. 3, No. 4 and No. 5 spots in
the lineup at a later date.

Little said that one substitution on his roster would be
benching center fielder Johnny Damon for Kofi Annan,
secretary general of the United Nations. "Johnny's working
with Unesco right now on some pretty serious stuff and
Kofi, whose name means `Friday' in his native Ghana, kindly
agreed to play."

The winner, of course, will play the Chicago Cubs in the
World Series. The Cubs qualified for the Fall Classic after
losing to the Florida Marlins on Wednesday.

wolfdancer
10-18-2003, 01:07 PM
Amusing!!!!!! I liked the "4 hour head start..."

Keith Talent
10-18-2003, 07:59 PM
That's hilarious. Gotta laugh after those two tragic finishes ...

Something to be said for consistency, anyway. Cubs and Sox did what they do best ... and so did Jeter and Co.

The way they both folded reminded me of that great scene from "The Hustler," where Newman's sprawled out over his chair, boasting after beating Fats all night ... "I'm the best you've ever seen ... even if I lose, I'm the best ..." And George C. Scott whispers to Fats ... "Stay with this guy, he's a LOSER."

Really, can anybody imagine Jeter throwing a tantrum the way Alou did when that fan interfered? More than anything, I think that led to the botched plays and bad pitches that followed.

Or Torre letting a pitcher do his job for him, like Little did, when he got a brain cramp and left Pedro in, despite the fact any fool could see he had nothing left, and the bullpen had been fantastic?

Oh, man, was it painful to watch ... so, yep, MLB will have to give the Sox five outs an inning, three power plays a game, maybe a tee-ball at-bat in every inning when they're behind ...

Kato
10-18-2003, 10:29 PM
Meanwhile, in real life, the Marlins beat the Yankees 3-2 and take the 1-0 series lead.

Kato

9 Ball Girl
10-20-2003, 01:55 PM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote Keith Talent:</font><hr> Or Torre letting a pitcher do his job for him, like Little did, when he got a brain cramp and left Pedro in, despite the fact any fool could see he had nothing left, and the bullpen had been fantastic?
<hr /></blockquote>The only thing, IMO, about that is what if Little took Martinez out and their reliever gave up the runs? Then everyone would've been bummed out 'cause they would've probably said, "well, if Martinez was left in the game, he would've gotten out of it." Little would've probably been blamed for whichever scenario, ya know?

It was a damned if you do, damned if you don't situation.

9 Ball Girl
10-20-2003, 01:58 PM
<blockquote><font class="small">Quote Kato:</font><hr> Meanwhile, in real life, the Marlins beat the Yankees 3-2 and take the 1-0 series lead.

Kato <hr /></blockquote>Well, it's 1-1 now. /ccboard/images/graemlins/tongue.gif

The Marlins have to win at least 1 game for God's sake! It gives them hope to reach a goal ya know? Sort of like dangling the carrot in front of a donkey. Hahahahahahahaha!

Wendy&lt;---still loves Kato but Squish the Fish!!! /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

Kato
10-20-2003, 02:17 PM
Go ahead and underestimate this team. I'm sure all New Yorker's are. You haven't watched this team play over the last 5 months. If you did, you'd know they've had the BEST RECORD IN BASEBALL, even better than your beloved Yankees. They are very much for real and a monster home field favorite in Pro Player.

Kato~~~says this series ends in 6..............but not the way most people think. /ccboard/images/graemlins/grin.gif

9 Ball Girl
10-21-2003, 09:06 AM
Well, let the bats do the talkin'!

Wendy&lt;---never ever underestimates anyone! Squish the Fish!